I like nerds, they smell like books
I like nerds, never cared for looks
I like nerds, they don’t care
‘bout silly things like combing hair
I like nerds, though some look like bums
I like nerds, we should all be one
Scene: Science Team Meet
Place: Danvers High School
Normally these science team meets are fairly tame, but a new element had been added into the mix: Mission Possible(yes, all the events have similarly silly names, i.e. an event about nerves called You’re Getting On My Nerves!); a highly technical affair where each team had to use as many energy types as possible to move a ball through an obstacle course and then catapult the ball off of the table. Not only did the technicality create a sort of energy in the air, but also many devices failed, and the many rules of the get-together ensured quite a bit of heated tempers. In laymen’s terms? Such a concentration and gathering of nerdiness would not soon be matched.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not ragging on nerds, but such a gathering can be downright creepy. The nerd in all of them was made manifest; an aura of acne and khaki pants settled over the room. It was a primeval congregation of ancient energies that threatened to engulf us all.
Many of these weren’t your garden-variety passive nerds either. Many were ambitious, St. John’s prep modern day nerds who were determined not to be denied their nerd status; they would fight their way to the top of the heap to claim the hallowed title of alpha nerd. There was spitting and cursing as hopes were crushed and victory was garnered; I thought I was going to see a nerd fight break out, which is never a pretty sight. I think I even heard whispered rumors of nerd sabotage and espionage. Not even a pocket protector was defense enough against such savagery.
Then the actual event started. Acid neutralization reactions bubbled, pulleys pulled; I laughed, I cried, I was entertained. Somewhere in all this chaos a victor emerged; I felt like singing: The king is dead, Long live the King! For the record, it wasn’t a cutthroat St. John’s Prep uber-nerd who won, but a team of two solo nerds - one older and one younger. And somehow
that felt right.
I survived that day – barely - and lived to tell the tale. You heard the story first from me, accept no substitutes. Sometimes scary, sometimes exciting, and always nerdy; science team meets are not for the faint of heart.
(One team even wears lab coats)