The Ballad of Star Wars
Note: This ballad only covers the events of Episode 4
A long time ago on a planet called Tatooine
Lived Luke, a young farmer lad.
Join the Rebellion he wanted to do
But he couldn’t leave, which made him mad.
His uncle needed a few droids for the farm,
So they went to the Jawas to trade.
From them they bought R2 and C-3P0.
These droids would work, they prayed.
But Luke was surprised when he discovered
That R2 carried a grave appeal.
The princess needed help from Ben Kenobi
Or she'd be a rancor’s next meal.
So Luke brought Ben the message from Leia,
But Ben didn’t seem to worry.
He gave Luke his father’s Lightsaber
Then made him get home in a hurry.
So Luke listened to Ben’s advice
And got home without delay.
But when he arrived, he discovered
That his uncle was blown away.
But Luke sucked it up and told Ben,
“I think that Leia had a good point.”
Ben told Luke that they could help her out
If they found a way to blow this joint.
So they went to the Mos Eisley cantina
To try and find a way out of there.
Sitting at a table they saw Han Solo
And his friend, a beast covered in hair.
They talked him into giving them a ride
To Alderaan, where the Rebels dwell.
But little did they know that Alderaan
Would soon turn into a living hell.
The men started to board the Falcon
But then took a look back.
Stormtroopers were firing upon them.
The Empire was on the attack.
The men escaped this small attack
And then went on their merry way.
But when they flew near Alderaan,
They found that it had been blown away.
Then Han Solo picked something up
Out of the corners of his eyes.
When they flew to inspect it, they saw it was
The Death Star, humongous in size.
The Death Star picked them up on tracking
And then started pulling them in.
When they finally arrived on the Death Star,
They saw stormtroopers; a whole kin.
A few stormtroopers boarded the Falcon
To search for signs of life.
Luke and Han ambushed the troopers,
And stole some armor, to limit their strife.
The band raided the control room
And stationed the droids to give aid.
Then Ben left and turned off the tractor beam,
But for some reason, he felt dismayed.
Then Luke and Han left to free Leia
From her detention block jail.
Some stormtroopers blocked off their escape path.
They looked for exits, but to no avail.
Then the Princess, with one misstep,
Kicked the wall with her boot.
And she broke the grate with her shoe. An exit!
So they all jumped down the chute.
The looked down and saw that they were in garbage.
They had no idea how to get out.
The walls started closing in on them,
So they all began to shout.
Then the droids, back at the control room,
Finally lent a hand.
They stopped the walls and showed the group a way out.
They all cheered! They were on dry land.
The group stepped out of the garbage compactor
And saw Ben in a fight
With Darth Vader; his lightsaber red as blood,
His armor dark as night.
Their lightsabers crashed together
And made a thunderous sound.
Ben held his saber up and prepared
For Vader to strike him to the ground.
The group, seeing an opening,
Hopped in the Falcon and started sailing
For Yavin IV, there the rebel base was.
There they could find the Death Star’s failing.
They landed on Yavin and entered the War Room.
There they found a way to thwart
The Death Star. All that’s needed was one proton
Torpedo down the exhaust port.
The Rebels took off to attack Death Star.
Tensions were running high.
They knew that if they didn’t win here,
They would have to say goodbye.
The empire fought relentlessly
With a thirst for blood they could not quench.
But somehow, in the chaos of it all,
Luke got into the Death Star’s trench.
He was being chased by Vader and his TIEs.
Vader was about to flip his lid.
Then Han, from nowhere, shot down Vader’s TIE
And told Luke, “It’s all clear, kid!”
As Luke was nearing the exhaust port,
He heard Ben say, “Use the Force, Luke.”
Straight as an arrow he launched the torpedoes.
The direct hit was not a fluke.
Then Luke went back to Yavin to celebrate.
The Rebels knew his heart would endure.
And they all had no doubt in their mind that
The Empire was crippled, for sure.
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