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The workings on the happiness within me are gone.
It's so strange that I should be able to bounce back after so much,
and then when everything settles down, the misery hits me, hard.
I can do nothing but read thanatopsis and feel wish, longly,
To pass on into a better life. I'm tired of fighting so hard.
I fight for nothing. I fight myself, and I fight all of the feelings
I hold within. I'm sorry that I'm not part of that perfect world.
And when I look upon others, tears come to my eyes. Why couldn't we
be better then this?

At a place of learning there is so much ignorence. I've heard a boy tell others that we must kill all of the towel heads. Like him. I heard that a class was throwing things at the back of the head of a Harvard Graduate from Ghana teaching Social Studies. Teaching children to respect cultural diversity. It makes me sad. And a boy casually goads another, calling him a faggot, telling him that he doesn't want his kind around. And I do nothing. I'm too weak.

And I think of how I won't let this continue. I won't let my world be turned to this. But I look into myself and find that, I am just as bad. And I cry for a love I may never have.

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