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At Voiceworks for a week, I find an open chair at lunch.

One of the faculty is there. She looks at me, with that "oh what does this person want from me" look. The table has gone silent. I really am just after an open chair, but apologize for interrupting.

Dark haired woman by me: "I have gone through a breakup. That's what we are talking about."

"You don't have to tell me about it."

"I am telling everyone!"

"Ok, that's fine."

She tells me. Then: "Have you ever gone through a breakup?"

I laugh: "Fourteen year marriage and two children."

"Oh. That's worse."

"Maybe." I say. "But it was not really about me. It was about my Ex needing to grow up as our son hit age 12." I explain a little.

She and her friend are interested. We talk some about relationships. They want true love.

"The problem is that both people keep growing. And they don't always grow in the same direction." I haven't said this even to myself before. "So true love, what is that? I wanted to be part of a couple that adore each other for 60 years, but now I think there is some luck involved."

"You aren't reassuring me!" laughs the friend.

"There are no guarantees." I say. "My Ex and I are very good friends. And yet it was the right thing."

We eat. It is the faculty person's birthday. People sing and someone brings her gorgeous dessert pastries.

At the end of the meal, the friend says, "Thank you for sharing your wisdom."

I can't remember anyone ever saying that to me before. So I thank her clumsily because I am so surprised. But then I keep thinking about true love and that I think it's a myth and a damaging one.


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