A woody, vinous, twining plant of the Leguminosae family, planted for its nice clusters of small white or pink flowers.

If you are passive aggressive, have a lot of time, don't care what your own yard looks like, and despise your neighbor, wisteria is an effective weapon of harrassment. Merely plant a wisteria within 5 or 10 feet of your property line. Siting is important. If your neighbor has any objects near the property line that can be climbed, entangled or enveloped in vines, ensure your wisteria is planted to take advantage of these.

Remember that fences are no barrier to your wisteria; ideally, your neighbor has a chain link fence that your wisteria can integrate itself into, and bond with. Wisteria will climb anything, and soon the all encompassing tentacles of this botanical abomination will have climbed over everything within its reach; perhaps even strangling the life out of your neighbor's prized dogwood.

In a decade or two you will enjoy the annual site of your hapless neighbor, hacking and trimming the scores of woody, reaching vines that have integrated themselves into his environment; secure in your knowledge that, like the hydra, his pruning is merely making the vines more determined, and that each chop your neighbor makes ensures three new vines will sprout, making next year's session even more exasperating to him.

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