One of my friends had the perfect way to get rid of Jehovah's Witnesses. He was a Satanist (LaVeyan Satanist, not Anti-Christian Satanist), and would offer to discuss comparative religion with them. That usually made them leave quickly.

He managed to top that one time, however. He and two of his buddies had just gotten back from hunting, and he was in the process of gutting a deer they'd bagged when the doorbell rang. He went to get the door, and saw the cheap suits and bicycles through the peephole. He grinned, and went back into the kitchen to get his butcher's knife. When he opened the front door, he grinned maniacally at them, and said, "Great! You're just in time for dinner! Won't you come in?" What the Jehovah's Witnesses saw was a demented-looking man, wearing a white apron over blue jeans, covered in blood and carrying a large, blood-stained knife. Not only did they leave fast, but he was never bothered while he lived at that address again...


Update, 2/28/02:
Lately, I've been beset by JW's trying to give me copies of Watchtower and Awake at the bus stop while I wait for my bus... So far, I've either ignored them or politely declined their requests. I do wonder, however, why the hispanic ladies always take and read copies of La Atalaya (The Spanish edition of Watchtower, I think), though...