I have recently (and very temporarily) moved in with my parents. I have done this due to the fact that I am going overseas at the end of the year and couldn't work out a suitable lease arrangement for the remainder of my time here. Since moving in my car has broken down. The timing couldn't be worse as I am no longer living just around the corner from work. It makes me mad. Mad enough to kill that stupid gearbox with nothing but a cheap shifting spanner and a severe lack of oil, ACK!

My main beef though is with the stupid car's stupid replacement. Sure, it's mechanically reliable, ultra fuel efficient and it gets me from A to B. Great, perfect! Unfortunately it's also a Volkswagen Golf from about 1975. No longer do my eyes drink in the beauty of my (substantially) modified Prelude, instead they are traumatised by the too narrow-too tall kinda sqaushed looking little diesel hatch. This wretched little thing threatens to cause me much seasickness everytime I wrestle it around a bend (and wrestle it I must). The combination of loose steering, soft to the point of being ridiculous suspension and a distinct lack of stopping power conspire against the unwary driver in ways previously thought impossible (by me at least).

"But there must be some redeeming features!" I hear you cry. Well....

NO

Let me see, there's the:

  • Engine - Loud and weak - if the engine was an optional extra I wouldn't buy it.
  • Clutch - Needlessly heavy - about 3 feet of travel.
  • Upholstery - Shot to hell - have fitted cheap seat covers in a vain attempt to lift the interior.
  • Stereo - Radio ok (!), tape only runs about ½ speed - one of two speakers make noise.
  • Wipers - Seem to only work in dry weather (I assume this is an electrical fault of some sort) - not really ideal.
  • Wasp nest - That's right, first time I opened the left rear door I was confronted with one of these on the back seat (admittedly, a backseat such as this is unlikely to see any action anyway). No longer present.
  • Ignition - Seems fine except that the key doesn't appear to fit the little key hole turning thing (the ignition barrel?) properly, in fact it's harder to turn than the lid on a salsa jar.

Ok, having said all that there are a couple of good points - for example I am enjoying being able to cruise into any driveway without slowing down (although it gets a bit bouncy). Fuel economy is good and it is basically free transport. I really shouldn't be whinging.

In the words of my imaginary VW engineer: "Sorry to waste your time with this shit"