Eye have a spelling chequer

It came with my pea sea

It plane lee marques four my revue

Miss steaks eye can knot sea.

Eye strike a quay and type a word,

And weight for it to say

Weather eye am wrong oar write

It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid

It nose bee fore two long

And eye can put the error rite

Its rare lea ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it

I am shore your pleased two no

Its letter perfect awl the weigh

My chequer tolled me sew!

I've seen many unattributed versions of this poem throughout the ages

Last year after repeated complaints at the shoddy spelling in my e-mails I gathered as many versions as I could to compile a hopefully definitive version as my .sig

The response from the powers that be?

Yew kneed eh gnu phucking cig!