Ironically,
Nietzsche's oft-uttered
maxim,
"That which does not kill me makes me stronger" does not appear to have been remotely applicable to his own life. History notes that
Nietzsche's final mental collapse in 1889 was precipitated by witnessing a coachman beating an old horse. Overwhelmed with
pity (an emotion he rallied convincingly against in
Thus Spoke Zarathustra) he rushed to the animal's aid. Conflicting accounts of the event have him either collapsing before he could insert himself between coachman and beast, or being found by others with his arms wrapped around the neck of the horse, weeping uncontrollably. In any event, he was returned,
deranged, to his apartment, where friends later found him playing piano with his elbows and singing madly.
Only a few days after the very public
breakdown, he authored one of his last known letters. In it, clear
evidence of his
madness abounds, as in this unnerving passage,
"'Dear Professor, in the end I would have much preferred being a Basle professor to being God. But I did not dare to carry my private egoism so far that for its sake I should omit the creation of the world ...".
1889, the year of his final, total
breakdown, also was the year he attempted an
autobiography of sorts,
Ecco Homo. It is as much an unnerving snapshot of the breaking mind as an account of his work and life, with chapters titles like, "Why I am So Clever" and "Why I Write Such Excellent Books".
No- the breakdown did not kill him, but none have argued that it made him stronger in any discernable way. Indeed, it must be remarked that
Nietzsche's latter life was spent in vegetative physical and mental
deterioration, which most believe was caused by an early
syphilitic infection. The deranged and unsound shell of a once-considerable intellect was left in the care of his mother. While she, a believer in
Christianity, found his
philosophical writings to be
abhorrent, she loved him as a mother and cared for her frail son until her own death several years later. He was then committed to the care of his sister, Elizabeth, who
exploited his growing popularity for her own financial gain.