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In the last year or two, a meme that talks about a Church of Adonitology has been floating around. An online search for the church leads to 2 closed Facebook groups and a link to a broken website. There is also a book on Amazon titled - The Book of Adonitology. It was written by a guy called King Adonis and published in 2020. Amazon describes the book thus:

One of the most influential books in the history of literature, recognized as one of the greatest literary master pieces of its time, The Book of Adonitology: The Sacred Pentadon are the five sacred books of the Adonitology religion. It is the holy revelation of the true existence of Adonis the Heavenly Father and Issa Elohim The Holy Spirit, the curvaceous Mother-God. These holy revelations were given to our Lord and Savior King Adonis on the day of his enlightenment by the Angel Elishamel on Jan. 3rd 1996. The Book of Adonitology is the supreme authority and living source of all Adonitology teaching, the sacred text that sets out the creed, rituals, ethics, and laws of Adonitology. Yet despite the growing interest in Adonitology teachings and culture, there has never been a form of sacred literature written for the modern day woman until now. The Book of Adonitology: The Sacred Pentadon of the Adonitology religion is written in contemporary language that makes the text easy to understand to the reader. The revelations are accurate and completely free of error. Furthermore, The Book of Adonitology: The Sacred Pentadon of the Adonitology Religion includes beautiful b&w paintings of some of the book’s most voluptuous female characters as well as our Heavenly Father’s first visitation by the Angel Elishamel. The dictionary is arranged as definitions for easy reference. The introduction recalls the visitation the King Adonis received by the Angel Elishamel on that fateful day as well as the Adonitology mantra. Of The Book of Adonitology: The Sacred Pentadon of the Adonitology Religion itself, examines and considers issues relating to human evolution, creationism, the relationship between the Triad and man, health and well being, science and technology, prosperity and the spiritual and sexual liberation of women with curves all in compassionate and brilliant fashion.

I would have bought the book except I am sure I would be disappointed in it. Looking through it, it appears to be making a serious effort to present itself as a religion. I find its imitation of the Bible to be in poor taste. Not because I am particularly religious but because it is not done well.

So since I chose not to join the Facebook groups nor buy the book above, I really cannot have an opinion on the teachings of the church. Except that I do. At the risk of being accused of objectifying women, I would say that I love a big ass. Or as I prefer to say it, a big arse. Or in Nigerian pidgin, a big nyash.

I would have written about Venus Callipyge except that from the pictures available, it does not look like she has that great an arse. Touting that arse as a great one, when it is not as big or shapely as mine, who is a guy; is like saying Miley Cyrus can twerk.

Iron Noder 2020, 24/30

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