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I've held you in my heart for so long.

Once you were the most precious thing in my life. You were the thing I woke up for. You were the reason I didn't go to bed.

You were the reason I never got any sex.

You were, in all likelihood, the reason I don't have a husband anymore.

And on Tuesday...

...I forgot you.

I was cuddling with my lover on my bed, and talking about web-pages.

Mine just isn't very good. So I'm building another.

I listed the people on my page to my Love.
"There's Joy, and Chris, and you, and Ville."

He looked at me.
"Who else?"

I couldn't think of you.

I couldn't recall anyone else being there.

Not until he said "beginning with A"

I was so amazed. And aghast. And subtly pleased. I don't quite know why.

I used to sit on my front porch under the wisteria, looking at the sunshine and think about you, sleeping.

I used to know what time it was for you always.

I used to rush home and get online to fall into your delight at seeing me.

I used to know... to feel...

You used to be my life

But... you're not anymore.

Hyvästi sudelmalla, Rakas

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