display | more...

My favourite Mighty Boosh quotes!!

Are you in envy of the majesty of Vince Noir and his delicate mop of hair? Are you astounded by the wisdom and practicality of the man that is Howard Moon? Well you may just be a Boosh-aholic like me.

As a tribute to The Mighty Boosh, the masterful comedic work of Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt, I have posted a few of my fav Boosh quotes. Enjoy! Btw - Feel free to add some of your favs!!

"Put away those fiery biscuits"

"C'mon, Bollo, get your monkey anus at the steering wheel."

"You better start getting the magic potions out, Mowgli, or we're gonna hurt you."

"I don't accessorize. I'm Howard Moon. There's a simple truth to me."

"Howard Moon: Where did you get those sunglasses from?
Vince Noir: A passing Coyote took pity on me.
Howard Moon: Took pity on you did he? He took a piss on me!
Vince Noir: I think in his own simple way he was trying to cool you down. "

"Vince Noir: Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard?
Howard Moon: This better be good.
Vince Noir: You know the black bits in bananas, are they tarantulas' eggs?
Howard Moon: Please don't speak to me ever again in your life. "

"You know nothing of the crunch!"

"I'm gonna creep inside you like a warm kitten!"

"The tie's a multi purpose accessory, y'know, belt, school boy, Rambo."

Its odd, upon receiving an unsolicited apology email from an ex. (which, interestingly, doubles as confirmation that he is semi-illiterate) I can’t even remember the person I was when his opinion mattered.

It said, and this is verbatim:

“Since u wont even say hi to me anymore, and u haven’t responded to any attempt ive made to talk to you, im just going to say everything right now because I have to. I dont why im serching for ur forgiveness, years later, but i just couldnt of imagened being on the other end of what happened and what i did to u. i really did care about you, and somewhere and for some reason i still do, maybe it was becuase you cared about me so much, especialy since i knew that i didnt deserve it, or i dont know, im not trying to relive the past, or try and become buddies or mates with you, i dunno i just think if i was you, id want answers and maybe thats the least i can do for you after everythin. you said to me once that some of the reason why u cant be fucked with guys is because of me. you didnt deserve the way I was to you and i just cant forgive myself for what i did, i know that sounds a little fucking gay and its a little fucking late and all the rest of it but it is what it is, im not trying to fix the past, im just trying to make some of the wrongs ive done in my life and one of the biggest ones ive done was losing my best friend of 3 years, my girlfriend, all becuase i didn't appricate how much they did for me. ill never get a chance with someone like u again and i fucked it up and im sorry and i dont want anything from you i just want u to know you were very special. there im done, i know i sound like a fuck head but there it is”

Now, it’s worth saying that during the days and months directly after we broke up, I avoided self destructive behaviour by reminding myself that success is the best revenge. I decided to use the pain I felt as fuel to better myself, I looked forward to the day where I would bump into him, fat, balding and blithering, and would do a victory dance in my head whilst listing off all the reasons why my life is better than his. All of this would occur during the standard 'So, what have you been up to?' conversation.

Surely then, this email is the stuff of closure-fantasy? Furthermore it negates the need to be stunningly beautiful and powerful and happy and loved and wealthy in order for the plan to come to fruition. I got his guilt-riddled explanation plus an apology, and I got it in writing. The reality was just me doing an internal 'wtf', followed closely by getting on with living my life.

The only concession to the expected cold satisfaction which failed to materialise, is that I can’t get that Connie Francis song, 'Who's sorry now' out of my head.

The End.

(Also, for a bit of background – We were best friends, he led me to believe he loved me, I lost my virginity to him, he became aloof and cold and put me down all the time, all the while, he was on-again-off-again with his ex, and I was the last person to know, and I was somehow convinced by him that this behavior was my fault. Boo-hoo.)

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.