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A comedy duo composed of Mark Sieve and Joe Kudla. Ralph Puke and Thomas Snot ("it's Flemish") travel around the country wearing tights and performing at Renaissance Fairs. Their vaudevillesque performance consists of verbal and physical swordplay, innuendo, puns, and outright nuttiness.

Some great lines, taken from their album Puke & Snot vs. The Bard in "Vowel Obstruction":

"I was walking in the woods one day when I came across two ferocious bears! But I shot them and had them stuffed."
"Mounted?"
"No, just shaking hands."

"I have been traveling around the country searching for new sources of energy, new ways for the King's subjects to heat their wretched hovels. To accomplish this I spent some time with the Queen".
"That's no solution for millions of people!"
"You don't know the Queen very well..."

"Right away I can see that this woman needs my help... Her lungs are badly swollen..."

"Your hair is like a field of sun-ripened wheat... I'd like to cut it, thresh it, and bake it into muffins..."

"My name was legend in these parts."
"Big deal, parts of me are legendary too."

"My uncle, the infamous pirate-poet Percy the Hook... he of the hook arm and the patch over one eye..."
"How'd he lose his eye?"
"He lost his eye when a seagull shat in it."
"Ridiculous! You can't lose an eye if some bird shats in it!"
"You can if it's your first day with a hook arm."

Spectators at Puke and Snot performances are advised to show up early, not sit too far in front, and watch out for when they spit raw vegetables. Pretty young women who do not wish to become part of the show will wish to sit closer to the back.

UPDATE:When I attended the Minnesota Renaissance Festival this summer (2002), Puke and Snot had left us and were in sunny California, damn them.

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