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Sally Brown is Charlie Brown's little sister from the comic strip Peanuts. She was born on May 25, 1959 (in the sense of being mentioned for the first time), and first appeared in the strip on August 23 of the same year. She is madly in love with Linus van Pelt, and wants to become a housewife when she grows up.

While Sally was a baby for much of the early 1960's, she entered school in the seventies, and thus sprang her major gimmick in the strip: mangling the English language. The following quotes are taken from the Peanuts FAQ, and appeared in the strip between 1969 and 1986:

My favorite piece is Bach's Toccata and Fugue in Asia Minor.

Did you know there are sixteen ozzes in a lib?

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care...in hope that Jack Nicklaus soon would be there.

Abraham Lincoln was our sixteenth king, and the father of Lot's wife.

Haven't you heard? This is the age of Aquariums.

Columbus Day was a very brave man. He wanted to sail around the world. 'I can give you three ships, Mr. Day,' said the Queen.

Two times two is tooty-two; three times three is threety-three; four times four is four-forty-four.

I have to do a paper on Ken and Abel. I've been looking all through the Old Testament, and I've found Abel, but I can't find Ken. Do you think maybe I'm using the wrong translation?

Maybe we'll get to see Ramona Lisa.

I'm writing a story about some cave men. They're sitting around a campfire, see, when all of a sudden they're attacked by a huge thesaurus!

Family life among the Egyptians was easier than it is today... they were all facing the same way.

The Incas were people who lived a long time ago in Incaland. They had a highly developed civilization. They would still be here today, but they lacked motel facilities.

Sheepherders raise lambs, from which we get lambchops. They also raise sheep, from which we get sheepchops.

This report is on melons. Melons have to be planted between May 15th and June 5th. I don't know what you do if you happen to be out of town.

Our wild life and our trees are protected by brave and dedicated men. These men live by themselves in towers, and are called Forest Strangers.

I could write about how exciting it is when the grape boats come sailing into the arbor.

The largest dinosaur that ever lived was the Bronchitis. It soon became extinct...it coughed a lot.

Ten milligrams equals one centigram...ten decigrams equals one gram...ten grams equals one grampa.

He was a very rich cowboy. He had a car and a horse. He kept his car in the carport, and he kept his horse in the horseport.

Butterflies are free. What does this mean? It means you can have all of them you want.

Who is the leader of these vandals? I will tell you: they are encouraged by Evandalists.

This is my report on rain. Rain is water which does not come out of faucets...after a storm, the rain goes down the drain, which is where I sometimes feel my education is also going.

Ancient Greece was ahead of its time, and before our time. They had no TV, but they had lots of philosophers. I, personally, would not want to sit all evening watching a philosopher.

"History of France: A Report on Cardinal Rishhalleouoooo"

Today is the observance of Washington's birthday. Actually, his real birthday is not until this Saturday. There is a reason for this. He could not wait to open his presents.

When writing about church history, we have to go back to the very beginning. Our pastor was born in 1930.

I'm going to try to sign up for a course in theology...I want to learn all about religion. I want to learn about Moses, and St. Paul, and Minneapolis.

I don't care anything about past participles; they don't interest me. How about present-day participles?

Light travels at a speed of 186,000 miles per second...so why are afternoons so long?

Some people are right-handed...some people are left-handed...some people are able to use both hands with equal ease. Such people are called handbidextrous.

When did Mark Twain write Tom Sawyer? If I know him, probably in the evenings.

You know where King David wrote his psalms? Under a psalm tree!

Sir Walter Scott's most famous novel was Ivanhohoho. King Tiglath-Pileser of Assyria conquered many nations, and carried off their booty... this meant that none of the little babies had any booties.

I'm writing a story for school. It's all about Santa Claus and his rain gear.

This is the classic story of Peter Rabbit and his coat of many colors. Wait until tomorrow, when I recite another classic, The Owl and the Fussy Cat.

I'm drawing a cow, but I'm having trouble with the hoofseses.

The sea is a body of water that would like to be an ocean.

This is my report on Halley's Comma. It's a very famous comma -- he probably wrote home a lot.

There are seven continents: Africa, Asia, Australia, Europe, North America, South America, and Aunt Arctica.

Britain was invaded in the year 43 by Roman numerals.

The farmer had a large house and a big red barn. Behind the barn the farmer had a pastor.

He was a very arrogant cowboy -- he would only ride on pompous grass.

The recreation room had a huge brick fireplace. The walls were covered with naughty pine.

"Tess of the d'Urbervilles, by Laural N. Hardy"

Maybe it was something Moses said, or something from the Book of Reevaluation.

Someone who reads the comic strip Peanuts carefully will usually divide the comic strip into two basic eras: the early strips, which focused on the then-novel idea of childhood loneliness, and the later strips, which were more fanciful and depended on visual gags and one liners. Some fans believe that Charles Schultz lost his edge at some point, but given how well received the early strips were, it is hardly an insult to say that the later strips were not quite as good. Sally Brown was introduced in 1959, which was right around the prime of the strip's early phase, but seems to have been featured more in later years, during the strips "gag" years. The list of quotes above gives one explanation of why: Sally Brown's confusion gives a good chuckle for someone who is only investing thirty seconds into reading a comic strip. As far as punch lines go, it is good stuff, and better than 90% of what you were likely to see on a comic page throughout the 80s and 90s.

Sally did have her reoccurring plotlines. She had a never ending crush on Linus van Pelt, and her anxiety over certain things, like attending school, were the same sort of anxieties that were the hallmark for her older brother. In general, however, she seems to escape the larger issues that envelope some of the other characters. Was Sally and her malpropisms just a gimmick thrown in by Charles Schultz when he got lazy and rich? While this could be argued, I think that Sally does have a bigger role in the strip. This comes across best in this strip:


Sally: Which gramma gave me the book---the fat one or the skinny one?
Charlie Brown: The skinny one.
Sally: Grammas should have names like people.

Sally comes across here as mean, self-centered and almost oblivious to the lives of people around her. Once I read that strip and saw those things, I read back and see that many of her jokes were more than just one-liners, but character pieces that showed that Sally was intellectually and emotionally oblivious to the world around her.

In this revisionist history, is Sally's real role the secret villain of Peanuts, with her self-centeredness exceeding the bossiness and bulling of the famous fussbudget, Lucy Von Pelt? That would not quite be the case in a series like Peanuts, and Sally is excused for her oblivious nature by the fact that she is still the baby of the strip. I think rather, that her attitude is a good foil in the strip. Her brother, Charlie Brown, was the epitome of self-awareness and over-analytical thinking. He was always aware of the thoughts and feelings of those around him, and of all the possible permutations those thoughts might take. Sally, on the other hand, was blissfully unaware of such things. One of the best examples of this is in their approaches towards romance: Charlie Brown imagines every possible outcome to talking to the Little Red Haired Girl, before losing the courage to speak to her. Sally Brown gleefully announces that Linus is her sweet baboo and seems totally unfazed at his consistent rejections of her. So Sally, in her overenthusiasm and undererudition, could be seen as a foil to the other characters. Of course, I don't know if Schultz plotted this out as such, but he certainly didn't get to his position without having a good idea of how characterization worked.
Post-script to those who like this type of thing: it also occurred to me that Sally resembles, in several ways (including her constant string of non-sequitors, and her relationship with her older brother), Delirium from The Sandman. Trying to fit other Peanuts cast members into The Endless is left as an exercise for the reader.

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