Lessons learned

A term used by the U.S. Military (mostly the Army) to describe knowledge gained the hard way - by making mistakes in combat and fixing them because you have to. The Army has an entire organization, called TRADOC for Training and Doctrine Command, whose job (among other things) is to collect lessons learned and distill them into doctrine and practices.

I want you back, she said.

The process of natural selection hones our genetic material in a way that allows the emergence of new abilities, new designs and adaptations.

What do you mean you want me back? You have your man. You made your choice.

In the same way, within any complex system the ongoing interactions cause the emergence of unexpected features, new, higher levels of meaning that cannot be predicted from the properties of the parts.

Look, I know I made a mistake letting you go and now I want you back. I love you.

The human brain is one of the most complex systems known to man, it is estimated to contain around 10,000,000,000 neurons.

Just like that? You think you can make everything that has happened magically disappear by saying you love me?

Each of these is itself a cell, a highly complex system in its own right. The chief emergent property of the brain is awareness - of others, of self, of the future and the past.

Don't make this any harder than it already is, I thought you still loved me, I thought this is what you wanted.

In turn, the interplay of brains in social situations gives rise to yet higher levels of emergent properties, ones unpredictable in terms of any individual. This common feature of all emergent systems is often overlooked when plans are made. Novelty arises from new combinations of interactions, new ways of relating to each other and to the planet.

There was a time when I did want that. I would have done anything to have you back. But.. things are different now.

And thus we learn...

"First, let me tell you gentlemen that everything contained in this report I am presenting to you today is outright lies and total bullshit."

"Well then, Bjorn, we have nothing further to discuss and our business is at an end."

"Holy shit are you serious?"

Let's rock.

Your fear is there in your eyes, plain to see, you pompous motherfucker. Outright lies and total bullshit.

Let's rock.

This guy named Cyril lives up the block from me. Who the fuck names their kid 'Cyril' anyways.

He's creepy as all hell and walks with a bit of a limp. It is more the kind of limp you get from being the sissy in a hard time prison than it is the kind that comes from having one leg slightly shorter and more bendy than the other. I could be wrong. I often am.

Don't name your kid Cyril. Lessons learned are not needed to be taught again. If you fail we teach them to you all over again. You start from the beginning again if you stumble. Back to the front of the line in the back of the line that is the front for what I am promoting in my new book out this summer.

Let's rock.

Stoned immaculate. Outright lies and total bullshit.

You're not going to be saved just yet. You have to fall just a little bit longer and a little bit further from the place where you began so it will mean all that much more to you that you have lost all that distance and memory. Start from the beginning again. If you stumble you go back to the front of the line in the back of the line that is the front for a whole new perspective.

Let's rock.

It’s been a long time since I graduated from high school and I don’t recall the event with too much nostalgia or fondness. For me, my fate had been sealed months before when I marched into a Marine Corp Recruiting Station and with my parents consent, signed on the dotted line.

In return for my signature I was to become what was known at the time as a “guaranteed grunt” and would receive the princely sum of $2,500.00 upon completion of boot camp at Parris Island. In addition, unless I fucked up (or got killed, which, come to think of it, might be one and the same), I pledged the next four years of my life to the service of Uncle Sam.

I have no regrets…

Anna graduated from high school this past Saturday and I was in attendance for the ceremony. It was a wonderful feeling as the other parents and I stood and cheered after the last student received their diploma. Even though her school has been in the news for all the wrong reasons lately, (see day logs of April 22, 2013, May 1, 2013 and May 27, 2013) we were there to celebrate the students accomplishments rather than acknowledge the administrations failures.

So far, this was a weekend to party with her fellow graduates and from the looks of it, party she did. A mere twelve or so hours after being freed from the chains of high school she went out and got her nose pierced. It seems her school had some rule about that and students were forbidden and could be expelled if they displayed such things while on school grounds.

Sunday evening came rolling along and I guess the parties continued. Anna got to my house a little after midnight and declared that she was whipped and going upstairs to bed. The usual “good nights” and “I love you’s” were exchanged and we both drifted off to dreamland.

Come Monday morning I was getting ready to leave for work. After completing my morning ritual I went upstairs to give her a peck on the forehead and was greeted with some teenage mumbles that couldn’t be translated to the English language so out the door I went.

borgo’s brain

”Hmmm, I don’t see her car, I wonder where she parked and I hope to hell it wasn’t stolen."

I traipsed back into the house and went upstairs and the conversation went something like this.

Me: “Honey, did you get a ride? I don’t see your car outside".

Her: “(unintelligible)”

Me: “Honey, where did you park? Did you drive here?”

Her: “(even more unintelligible)”

Me: “Honey, I’m a little worried, your car isn’t here and I hope it wasn’t stolen.”

Her: groggy voice “Car…..towed….mom…knows….’bout….it”

Normally, I’d be pissed and start ranting and raving about such matters as responsibility and how could you be so unaware about things and blah, blah, blah.

Instead, I took a deep breath and thought to myself, “Ok, I’m just glad she’s safe and sound” and let’s not make this about me. I have a habit of doing that from time to time that hasn’t served me well over the years.

Yesterday, she and her mom picked up the car from some impound lot. I still don’t know the circumstances surrounding the reasons why her car was towed in the first place and don’t plan on asking. I figure, if she wants to tell me, she will.

More importantly, her days here in C-bus are numbered. It won’t be long before she’s headed off to the University of Cincinnati where she plans on studying environmental science and I don’t know when I’ll see her again.

When I left for boot camp on some sunshiny day back in June of 1976 my father didn’t even get out of bed to wish me luck or to say goodbye. That kinda stung and things between him and me were never quite the same after that. There was an already existing feeling of acrimony between us and I think that little stunt just intensified that feeling.

Even after he died, I still find it hard to forgive him for that one.

When Anna leaves for college I plan on being right there with tears in my eyes, my heart bursting with pride and no acrimony between us.

Nobody should have to carry that kind of baggage around for the rest of their lives.

Especially over something so stupid as a car being towed or your nose being pierced after you just graduated from high school.

Lessons learned.