The opposite of BDSM is loosely called vanilla sex, a term that roughly refers to sex without any elements of BD, DS, or SM. The distinctions between vanilla sex, foreplay, and BDSM are not clear-cut. How you describe yourself is largely a matter of personal choice. Many common vanilla activities are in
fact components of BDSM. But if you want to think of yourself as vanilla with a twist of mint, by all means do so. Source: http://www.submission.net/AboutBDSM1.html