Moving on...it's funny, we all hate
being in a rut, but we also hate
endings and
uncertainty. Moving on is hard, from a
romance ending, a
parent dying, to just the end of the
summer.
I'm moving on from a lot of things right now, and it's very, very
weird. I've been living in this place for almost 12 years, the longest I've ever lived anywhere. I've graduating from
college, moving to the biggest
metropolitan area I've ever lived in by far--without a
place to live--and I don't know if I'll be in
grad school at
Stanford for 1 1/2 years (
MA) or 5-6 years (
PhD), or any idea what kind of
job I'll get or how I'll pay
rent and
tuition in the meantime, or how I'll pay for the
surgery on my
wrist that I need... all the
safety of the previous 22 years is gone. It's good to be moving on--I
know that. I'm looking forward to leaving here, I'm looking forward to moving to the
Bay Area. And my most
loved ones are going with me. So sure, it's a
good thing.
But it's strange...
--and
frightening.