The other day, several posters appeared on various walls of my high school that said something to the effect of the following:

Over 160,000 Children Are Starving in Third-World Countries (THAT COULD HAVE BEEN YOU IN A PAST LIFE!!!) Come to this random meeting and give us money that we'll give to the starving Elbonian people


Mua ha ha..prime cynic fodder. Let's break this down:
First off, we can assume due to the "past life" remark that the author of the poster believes in reincarnation. Great. They also believe that the readers of the poster have been reincarnated, but more specifically, reincarnated from a third world country into a pretty well-to-do Massachusetts suburb. Common sense tells us that if you're gonna be reincarnated, then the sooner ya die, the sooner ya come back, right? Right.

So why are we helping these people? By sending them money, aren't we just prolonging their misery and denying them their opportunity, nay, their right, to be reborn into a stable economy? So I say we shouldn't be sending them money, cause the more you contribute, the more suffering they endure



Disclaimer: I do not actually believe this. I'm kidding. It's horrible that these Elbonians need to suffer. All i'm saying is the author shouldn't have added that reincarnation thing