When you are asleep more than you are awake during a particular day you begin to question reality.

This is how it was for me yesterday...I came home after school and slept for hours because I had nothing better to do. I had wonderful, exciting, and scary dreams. It disturbed me when I was interrupted, various times because of the phone and then for dinner. I did not want to wake up, because reality is so much more mundane and boring than surreality. In reality I had nothing to do, I was grounded, alone and bored. In my dreams, I was running, evading murderers, kicking my ex's ex's ass, and eating pineapples. This is why I never sleep, it sucks to get up.

It also sucks not having a car. I feel so dependent on others, which I hate. I was going to go over to my ex's house, but since I couldn't drive over there, and he didn't want to pick me up, it didn't happen. Maybe it's for the best, although we are actually becoming genuine friends again, which is nice. He talks to me about his problems instead of hiding them from me. And I tell him about mine now, mostly because he is no longer my biggest problem. He told me about how his ex is sending him mixed messages and he doesn't know if he wants to get back together with her because he might need to be alone for once and he might be able to do better. I don't care if he does get back together with her, but I hate how she is so jealous of me that she won't allow him to have any kind of relationship with me and/or gets mad whenever she hears that he has talked to me. So I guess me and him will have to have a secret relationship, again.

I got an e-mail last night from someone that I dated a while ago but kind of ended with on bad terms. He asked me how I was doing and said he really missed me, which was nice. I don't know what he wants, I don't see us dating again, but it's nice when people from my past take the time to miss and think about me. I do it all the time, but I usually never tell anyone.