So Many Nodeshells, So Little Time
Writer's block came calling about three weeks
ago, and has overstayed his welcome. He raids my refrigerator regularly. He
has poor bathroom habits (can't he at least use a tissue to remove those bits of
toothpaste from my sink?). And he snores. Worst of all, he's deviously
brilliant at finding ways to hinder any effort I might make to express
myself creatively.
Practice my singing? He breaks a faucet.
Photoshop some images for friends? He demands that his laundry be done ("And
don't forget to {wait to} put Downy in the rinse cycle - those
dryer sheets give me hives!!")
Plan to prepare a lovely, exotic repast? My time is consumed steering a cart
around the local supermarket, not seeking rare seasonings or the finest seasonal
produce, no. I walk about listlessly, shopping for junk food for him. About
this I should not complain, though. I hereby admit that I have partaken of a few
bits of pepperoni, potato chips and even a cupcake or two from his stash.
The biggest problem he causes is this. There are a few folks on this site I
respect who've asked for more writeups. It would make me happy to no end to fill
the nodeshells and/or topics that they've listed. And then, of course, there's
my own list, which seems to grow exponentially every time I actually put pen to
paper (or fingertips to keyboard) and get down to the nitty-gritty.
Well, the answer came to me this morning. I locked him in the closet. Oh,
revenge so sweet! The old Hoover in there is so full of dust
that he's sneezing up a storm. His plaintive cries of "I'm afraid of the
dark!" fall on deaf ears. My favorite moment was when he complained he had
nothing to do. I suggested that he experiment with his female
side and try on one of the two dozen or so pairs of shoes my wife has in there.
And I left the house promptly to go to work.
So here it is, a daylog, a bagatelle; yet it's writing of some sort.
Well, guess what? These few paragraphs took over three hours to craft.
Why? There are more like him. And they're pissed off that
one of their own is languishing in my downstairs closet.