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Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the man with alektorophobia kicked it there to keep it at a safe distance.

Alektorophobia is, of course, the fear of chickens. Although usually the phobia is contained to live chickens, occasionally the phobia extends to eggs and cooked chickens. Some rationale for this fear might be a general fear of birds being coordinated to attack by an disgruntled townswoman, or perhaps a chicken's daily habits - eating worms, pooping in their own nest, and half of them receiving the questionable nickname "Cock".

Now you've really ruffled his feathers ...

Interestingly, sufferers of alektorophobia often believe that chickens are far from benign: they usually feel chickens (yes, chickens) are conspiratorial and aggressive, and often appear to always have an eye on you when you are around them. They are afraid of acting out on their phobia by attacking a chicken (as in the case of the poor punchline subject above) because of possible retaliatory measures.

Discovering a loved one can't control their urge to run every time they see a commercial for KFC or listen to The Beatles' "Good Morning" is not as bad as you might think. A good place to start with the cure would be with a harmless hard-boiled egg. One night as they are sleeping, simply hide several of them around the house. After one month, take your patient around to your hiding spots, showing him or her that he or she has been close to them all along and they never once caused him or her any harm. This strategy is foolproof. So, good luck, but remember: if they curl up in the fetal position and beg for the feathered beasts to go away, whatever you do - don't call them chicken!

My humor is my weakness.

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