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Find someone who owns a Volvo.

Volvos have a reputation for being really safe cars, and so lots of people drive them who think they're invincible. Ha! I say. You're not invincible! You can be kicked in a Volvo!

Try not to kick if you're the driver

Kicking while driving will make you take your attention off the street. This will be mitigated somewhat since you will probably use your gas-pedal foot to kick, and so the car will slow down, but you still could kill someone. It's like texting while you drive.

Know what you are trying to kick

Get a clear aim at your target and bring your leg into the chamber position. Since you're sitting, it will look like you're trying to fart. It will be easiest to hit the person nearest you with the sole of your foot. You can also sometimes get a knee with the toe of your foot. Shins make a good target.

Here's a list of common student questions

Am I allowed to kick a Volvo driver like that?

YES. Since you're in a Volvo, you'll probably come out a little better than you would in most cars from any accident that ensues.

Yeah! What about causing an accident? Won't my insurance rates go up, or something?

Volvo drivers have bad reputations, so everyone will blame the driver. (See second point).

If this is the beginner's info, what is the advanced info?

You want to learn to leap safely from a speeding car, as otherwise you're trapped with the person you just kicked. You also want to avoid vomiting on your great grandma's Volvo in the early hours of the Vernal Equinox. That is handled in another node.

Later considerations

Often, much of the strategy goes into the body type of the person you are kicking. Short people like children are better targets 'cause you can kick them in the face or stomach pretty easy. Tall people pretty much you're only going to get in the knee, unless you're an acrobat or a real kick-ass fighter type. Fat people are more insulated-like, so they don't feel the kick so much.

What about kicking someone in the Vulva?

That's another topic altogether, but I think Ellen Page is going to star in the movie adaptation.

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