Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Everything
2
Deciding which heart to break next
(
personal
)
by
jessicaj
Tue Jan 09 2018 at 2:20:55
There's only
one type of man
that
falls in love with
a woman like me
.
I discourage males because love
is messy and I like it when my
statistical models are predictable.
Most mornings I'm up at 4:00 AM.
Every third Sunday I let myself sleep
until 4:01, other days I watch my
iPhone
flip from 3:59:59, it's
those little things in life.
I can only have
a finite number
of people making demands on my
time and energy. I'll tell men
straight up that I'm not looking
for anything long term. I want
his insatiable curiosity, predatory
instincts, and help getting my
bottles of
Burgundy
off the
top of my dustless refrigerator.
Short men need not apply.
Whenever other women ask how
I get these men I tell them that
the trick is to be dangerous and
mysterious.
Charisma
is a skill;
don't believe me? Hand over
your credit card number and I'll
teach you how to use neuro-
science to your advantage. It
wasn't cheap, but
this degree
practically pays for itself.
There are no rules and one
objective. Anything goes, all
is fair in love, and war, this
is a little bit of both. When
two minds meet, only one
of them can be the ultimate
victor. Do you really believe
that tripe about it being
better to have lost at love?
Real women play to
win
.
My lists are short. I'm incredibly
efficient, time management
is virtual money. You don't get the
title of heartbreaker by being
one of the
nice girls
. This overly
dramatic nonsense about soul
mates and
happily ever after
has got to stop, but there are
still fools walking around thinking
he will be the one to
open my heart
.
Thankfully intelligent men
know that telling me that
they love me is a waste of
time just like the presents,
flowers
, and all the rest of
that crap. I can buy tickets
for myself and I know more
about baseball than a lot
of people who own a penis.
No,
I don't eat popcorn
.
Currently my friends are
keeping track of Hall of
Fame votes. We break
down the process and
discuss how limiting it
is to have a ballot of ten.
Last year my friend
from
Detroit
abstained
from voting entirely.
I respect that in a man.
Today there are two names
on my list. Someone's heart
is going to break and now I
have to go through the decision
making process. I don't enjoy
this. I actually hate it, but you
don't get ahead in life by
procrastinating. I agonize
for a millisecond; breaking his
heart is like
shattering my own
.
Sometimes I think the only
thing worse than someone
falling in love with a woman
who will never soften is living
in a world that is willing to
believe the worst of me. I
wasn't assembled in Silicon
Valley, I bleed real blood, I
cry
real tears
, I have real
feelings. Touch me, you'll see.
I never thought it would come
to this, but I have no illusions
left. It's come down to him,
or me, one of us is going to
wake up on the wrong side
of heartbreak. I've come too
far to let him win. I'm the
INTJ
Mastermind, I refuse to admit
defeat.
Do we have a future
? Will
I win, or will he, try to
negotiate
?
To be continued...
she wants to kill and break hearts
Two Golden Rules of Being a Woman
INTJ
June 5, 2019
Small pieces of divorce
Sympathy hose
Timex "water resistant" watches do not necessarily resist the Dead Sea
AED
clear
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