Frankenhooker is one trashy movie. But it's one really good trashy movie, as long as as you aren't looking for deep thinking, insightful characterization and a message. But it's a great movie nonetheless.

The plot is simple, James Lorinz plays a Mad Scientist, who working out of a 2 1/2 car garage has come close to solving the barrier between life and death. His girlfriend played with an excess of clothing by former Penthouse Pet Patty Mullen. They're the perfect couple. He's deranged, obsessed and just plain wierd, while she's sweet, supporting and completely clueless. Unfortunately, for her, cluelessness and lawn tractors don't mix well, and she has a deadly accident. Only her severed head survived.

But what's the point of having a mad scientist for a boyfriend if he can't perform a little ressurection? Particularly, if some improvements can be made, as the earlier girlfriend had eaten way too many brownies by Hollywood Actress Standards. No, he can make her better. All he needs is a body.

Better yet, a whole lot of bodies, so as to mix'n'match. And he knows just where to get them, too. For the local town has a surplus of hookers, who are continually tempting him in their high heels, halter tops, and hot pants. So he takes out his Lionel chemstry set and whips up a batch of super cocaine. It's better than other cocaine, because it makes the hookers explode. But not before it makes them really horny so they get buck nekkid and ready for lesbian orgies.

So our intrepid mad scientest sets out upon his new quest, of collecting perfect body parts to recreate his girlfriend as the perfect woman. And eventually he succeeds, as Patty is recreated as the Woman of his Nightmares, buff, stacked and stitched. And a little bit of her new, hookers body had turned sweet Patty into someone a little more interested in gratuitous nudity. The front cover of the movie says it all: "Wanna Date?"

Joe Bob Briggs gave Frankenhooker the coveted Hubbie Award as Best Drive-In Movie of 1991. (Okay, 1990 but it takes awhile to get the nominees in order). Joe Bob called it "the movie that will still be grossing us out 20 years from now:" and gave it "a perfect 100 on the vomit meter".

Frankenhooker represents some of the finest trash ever made. Producer Edgar Ievins and director Frank Henenlotter have made a film no one will ever forget, no matter how much they might wish it. So pick up a twelve pack of light beer, a box of kleenex and check it out.

Drive In Gold Star Award to JD for letting me know the original poster quoted Bill Murray saying "If you see only one movie this year it should be Frankenhooker" and referring to the film as "A terrifying tale of sluts and bolts".

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