At first I didn't recognize that you were you. I stared awhile with no thoughts running through my head. It's a good thing I did know you or I would've been labeled a stalker (it wouldn't be the first time, though). So you started walking towards me...

and in the middle of those people
awaiting to reach the end
i heard such a violent scream
as if the air were actually
protesting your advancement

But that didn't stop you. Maybe you didn't hear it...too busy listening to the beautiful sound of whatever peace you had found within your head. And I couldn't prevent myself from being drawn into your amiable gravitational pull.

How are things? Fine. One more year? Yeah...I couldn't take anymore. Is that your car?

and the scream had turned into a howl
and i was straining not to let you notice
that i was under such auditory pain
for fear it would tear your tattered existence
even further

We were never great friends. Friend of a friend of a friend, we could sometimes get a decent conversation going. But now I couldn't speak over that horrible noise. When you told me that your father was an idiot I numbly nodded, to the shock of the fellow patrons.

I've never been able to grasp the mechanics of ending a conversation. Good thing you were the mistress of social graces and you easily put the failing discourse out of its misery. So we avoided each other's eyes the rest of the time we were in line.

Why do you people always do this to me? I feel such pain over these shallow friendships that went nowhere and taught me nothing. It's such regret... I can't remember a single thing we talked about together, but I do remember that I thought you were a jerk. You probably thought the same about me. We hid it beneath our words and actions so slyly, but it never went unoticed by either one of us. But now here we are, forced by the fading memories of time to treat each other civilly.

where all the quiet disapproval
used to reside there now exists
in the spot left empty
a mutual desire to dismiss past lives
and ignore our true feelings.



I liked it the old way.


p.s. I won't tell others of this encounter...just to use you as a namedropped reference...Oh, I saw so-and-so here and you won't believe how she looked and who she was with...that sickens me. You probably won't give me the same anonymity, but that's how you were. And that's probably how you'll stay the rest of your life while I eternally ponder if I could have made a difference.

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