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I had another one of those experiences today where I wake up in someone else's house and my pants are way the hell on the other side of the room when someone comes through the front door and gets enraged about me being there and not having any pants on. Prudes like this are a big problem in today's modern society. When this boob asked me what I was doing in his house, acting as if that was suspicious because (a) He didn't know who I was, (b) Didn't know what I was doing there, (c) I wasn't wearing any pants and they were way the hell on the other side of the room. I didn't know why either, which is why I took offense and put his head through the wall, took his wallet, and slit his throat. Lets see them try to prosecute me for this one. It was obviously self-defense and a stand your ground type situation. 

Even if it was wrong, I already have 54,734 outstanding warrants, which is one shy of my former hero Donald Trump's associates. I am probably low on the list of priorities for the brave men and women of today's modern FBI.

I don't feel like it. "I don't feel like it." If someone says this to you when you ask them for quickie sex in the toilet even though you've never met before and you are at a family beach, you know they are showing you disrespect. Take appropriate action. The stand your ground laws will protect you if overzealous cops come looking for you.

Is it normal for your genitals to turn completely black during your sleep cycle? Mine did and I'm not sure if I need medical help. If you think I need medical help, please note that I am unable to go to regular hospitals because of the brave men and women of today's modern FBI. I will need to hire my own staff. To help with this, please send an uncancellable check to me for $70,000.

Another investment opportunity with one of my shell companies is coming up. If you are interested, $70,000 will get you a copy of my new book, Avoiding Internet Scams and will also include the full 84 volume set of The Anals of History so this is an opportunity not to be missed. Jet off a check today and get professional insider tips on what Internet scams are and how to avoid them. For $70,000 this is a good financial option because some of these scams will take you for much more than that. I know most noders couldn't get by if someone stole even a hundred millions dollars out of their savings account. Some of us have multiple billions of dollars, but some noders are only coming in around the 200 million range the last time I looked at the membership background info on file here in the everything2.com brand website offices.

I'm also looking into a film project called Naked Straight White Men in Austria which will be a feature length documentary on the emergence of the straight white subculture in Europe in the modern day and how it threatens local populations that are very tribal in nature. To invest in this project, and note that films like that "Endgame" show routinely haul in billions, a $70,000 investment here hs the potential for a HUGE payout. Don't miss out.

I hope these opportunities interest you, for they provide an opportunity for you to achieve financial independence. Contact me today.

My friends.

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