I always promised myself that I would remember.

That no matter what, I would not be one of "those" adults.

That I would recall, and understand, exactly what it was to be young, to be a child. To be below 20.

And then, abruptly, at some point, I could no longer tell what age anybody was. Pump Up the Volume was no longer my favorite movie...it didn't ring quite true anymore.

I had lost something...like a left sock in the night.

Now...I know that children see things differently. I manage to remember that they are, in fact, much more intelligent than we would often like to believe, in the face of things they do and buy into.

That they have hopes and dreams, and fairly good reasons for pursuing them.

But the connection is gone. An unfathomable something is missing, and I can't, for the life of me, put my finger on it. I've grown up, somewhere in the night, without having quite become an adult...but without any of the benefits of childhood.

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