or The Most Pretentious Name Ever

It was a Sunday afternoon, five Backwoods hicks from the northernmost city in the world were hanging around in a basment, putting the finishing touches on our characters for Shadowrun. I had recently been expanding my horizons by reading books on the subjects of philosophy and justice, and when it came time to create names for our characters, with philosophy on my brain, I tried to create The Most Pretentious Name Ever, and I delivered Nietzsche Dostoyevsky, as a homage to the two historical figures.

Right on cue, my four friends began to shudder and convulse with the idea that I would even utter such a name. So therefore, just as quickly as it came into existance, it was gone.

Later that evening, while watching and episode of The Sopranos, A.J. Soprano was just learning of Existentionalism, to which Nietzsche is acredited with being the precursor of. Being the naive youngster he was, he loudly pronounced it "Neetch", (or "Nitch", as it was spelled with Closed Captioning). This honest mistake then brought out a new idea within this devious, ether-infused brain of mine. The next week, I would unveil my new creation...

Whenever I brought up the topic of Dostoyevsky, my friends, having had trouble pronouncing it in the past, were quick to correct me with their new pronunciation, "Dusty" . So the next week, I once again brought up Nietzsche Dostoyevsky, with it's accompanying title "The Most Pretentious Name Ever". However, upon restating this, I was quick to add, "Or if you speak it in english, 'Dusty Nitch'". This almost caused an aneyurism with out linguist freind, who afterwards, could only utter a stifled "What?" I explained to them my reasoning for changing it, and after they kicked my ass for making such an insipid remark in the first place, then having the nerves of steel to explain it, I woke up on the front step with a 12 sided die stuck up each nostil, and bruises in the shape of the Dungeon Masters Guide on my back. However, I'm glad they did it, because as my parents would say "It's the only way I'll learn".

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