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a parable . . .

So I'm sitting around on the beach with a bunch of buddies of mine. We're smoking a fat blunt, sitting up high, near the wall. It's a beautiful early summer evening, about 6:00. The sun is behind the buildings so it's not too bright but, still that wonderful warm yellow glow continues to hang over everything.

We're in Providence, hanging out on the RISD campus, which is just down the hill from Brown University. It's late May and parents from all over the world are shuffling about anticipating the big Brown graduation ceremonies that evening.

The beach itself is no more than a quarter acre of grassy knoll situated at the intersection of the busiest streets on "College Hill". We call it the beach because it's where people go to lay on the grass, get high, drink 40's, and otherwise lounge about checking out the passers by. It's a great spot because up near the wall, behind which is the freshman dorm, you have a clear view of everyone walking up the hill. It's also a great spot to smoke a joint because you are a good distance from the road and can see the rotund, pale, RISD security professionals lumbering up the hill in time to hide your shit.

I'm sitting there with about 7 or 8 stoners, enjoying the warm orange summer evening, as well as the massive doobie that Adam graciously rolled for us. We finished the joint and are commenting on the various people that are passing by the beach on their way to Brown. Most of what we have to say is rather negative, reinforcing the stereotypical rivalry between Brown and RISD. Nevertheless, we were having a grand old time.

I was extremely high, I could smell the sunlight, when I first saw him. He was walking up the hill in a slow and steady manner. He was escorting two women, one on each arm. He wore sunglasses, a blue blazer, and lots of gold rings. One look at this asshole and I could tell that he thought he was the cat's meow.

He was walking up the hill, toward us, in a manner unlike any I had ever seen. It reminded me of Sean Connery. Seeing the rings, the blue blazer, and the women, I shouted out to my stoner friends, "Hey look at that schmuck, he thinks he's Ringo Starr!"

I could see the man cringe as I yelled my witticism, he had obviously heard my remark. The eight of us howled with laughter as the man continued to slowly make his way up the hill with a beautiful woman on each arm.

We continued to laugh hysterically as he came closer on his path up the hill. It was then that I realized my most obvious mistake! I shouted out, "Wait, wait, holy shit, that IS Ringo Starr!!"

Too which all of my stoner buddies immediately checked out the man in the blue blazer, gold rings, with a women on each arm, and began to laugh uncontrollably for five minutes as they rolled down the hill in hysterics.

For they had realized what I had, Ringo Starr's daughter went to Brown.

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