i wake up
and there's a note
posted to the large mirror on my dresser. i try to read
it without turning on my light:
go to store.
buy face wash
exercise--the park is good for walking or running.
(or being alone to write).
register for class.
do not go back to sleep after reading this!
quit reading things in the dark.
(it strains your eyes).
nothing would get done if it weren't for her. she strives to be organized and to make everything she touches reek of perfection.
i hate her because i can't be near her. but i can't stand to be near her when i'm a slob. i can't be near her when i sit up at night and write those things she thinks are paranoid and crazy. i can't be her when i lose my motivation and i lay in bed at 4:30 pm when i should be outside saving humanity. i don't understand her.
but she understands me. she takes pity upon my poor soul and thinks ahead. she sees through dark tunnels, she sees through fog...forces me to buy healthy food so i won't eat junk food in times of hunger. usurps my body and makes me see like she does.
i wonder if i need anyone at all since i have her...