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The Auditors, as they are referred to as throughout the Discworld novels by Terry Pratchett are, as blandoon puts it quite nicely in the write up for Thief of Time, "something like the Universe's middle management." They beings are not allowed to think of themselves as individuals. In fact, as soon as one of them utters the word 'I,' 'my,' or any singular possessive, cease to exist in what seems to be an unpleasant manner, only to be replaced by one identical to it.

The goal of the Auditors seems to be to rid the universe (and especially Discworld in particular) of those annoying, messy, and overall unnecessary sentient life forms. They have appeared in many of the Discworld novels, especially those concerning Death and his familiars, with various plots to purge their universe of these annoying beings in an effort to make the universe more tidy and civilized.

I was originally going to list which books the Auditors have appeared in, but unfortunately I’ve forgotten over the 2 years that I’ve been obsessive with the Discworld series. They do however appear in Reaper Man, Thief of Time, and Hogfather for sure.

The Auditors of Reality, who exist beyond space and time, are the Lawful Evil of the Discworld series. Their major trait is that they are very bureaucratic, even more so than Douglas Adams' Vogons, and completely intolerant of change or individuality. However, this makes them very hostile to one of the more recent changes in the Universe – Life.

The Auditors wish to eliminate all life-forms – not just humans, not just intelligent beings, *ALL* life-forms.
As usual, Death said it best:

Down in the deepest kingdoms of the sea, where there is no light, there lives a type of creature with no brain and no eyes and no mouth. It does nothing but live and put forth petals of perfect crimson where none are there to see. It is nothing except a tiny yes in the night. And yet... and yet... it has enemies that bear on it a vicious, unending malice, who wish not only for its tiny life to be over but also that it had never existed. Are you with me so far?
Good. Now, IMAGINE WHAT THEY THINK OF HUMANITY.

Suffice it to say, these aren't the nicest beings in the multiverse. They even managed to get Death fired from his job in the events of Reaper Man, for having a personality. As a result, he became a human (naming himself Bill Door), and died. Sort of. Almost. He was reprieved just in time, though, and vanquished the replacement Death. The Death of Rats and Death of Fleas remain as a side-effect of this temporary "retirement".

In Hogfather, the Auditors are the start of the whole mess, when they hire the Ankh-Morpork Assassins' Guild to "delete" the Hogfather. However, the plot is foiled, and Death confronts them, and we hear "the wails die away"... but those may not have been all of the Auditors.



Death's quote copied from
Pratchett, Terry. Hogfather. New York: HarperCollins, 2000. pp. 323-324.
A very, very good book, so GO BUY IT!

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