I'm giving up on boys.

And given that I'm gay as the day, this isn't going to be easy. Smoking is probably easier to quit. It's not that I don't like boys, I love them. LOVE them. I love the way that when you find a good one worth keeping around for awhile, the two of you can just snuggle for hours and be content in each other's arms. It's too bad that most of them are complete dicks, because now I'm giving them up. Cold turkey.

I've had it with meeting nice, cute boys who give me their phone number and then don't return a call. And then there are the boys who I go out with that have nothing on their minds but sex. Don't get me wrong, sex is wonderful, sex is fun, sex feels amazing! But, um, could we spend some time getting to know each other too? As crazy as it may sound, I'm gay AND I have a brain. I know it sounds ludicrous, stop laughing.

So I give up. I'm done looking for Mr. Right, and I'm tired of finding all these Mr Right Now guys too. So if you want it that badly, go to a club. I'll just cozy myself up with a few good friends at one of the 457 Starbucks cafes on Ventura Boulevard, and wait for you to stop by my table and ask me what I'm reading...when you're ready to try something real.

I, windigo, do solemnly swear, to love, honor and cherish myself enough not to give in to boys ever again. I will do my damndest to keep my head above water in this ridiculous ocean of dating. I will respect only those boys who see me as a perceptive, intelligent young woman, and not a piece of ass. I will love only the man who can run and keep up with me. Right after I finish with this one.

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