Sold by
Sam Waterston in the
Saturday Night Live commercial for
Old Glory
Insurance. Here is an abridged description:
Interior, old lady's living room
Gladys: It's so hard nowadays, with all the gangs and
rap music.
Erma: "
What about robots!?!"
Phyllis: "Oh, they're everywhere!"
Erma: "I don't even know why the
scientists make them."
Ethyl: "Aaron and I have a policy with Old Glory that covers us in case
we're
attacked by robots."
Erma: "An insurance policy with a
robot plan ? Certainly I'm too old..."
Cut to Sam standing in front of Old Glory Logo.
Sam: "I'm Sam Waterston of the popular TV series
Law and Order. As a
senior citizen you're probably aware of the threat
robots pose.
Robots are
everywhere and they eat old peoples medicine for fuel.
Cut to man in large 50's robot suit barging into old persons bedroom and
stealing his medicine, Sam continues in voice-over:
"Well now there is a company that offers coverage against
the unfortunate
event of a robot attack.
Old Glory will cover you with no health checkup or age consideration.
You need to feel safe, and that's harder and harder to do nowadays because
robots may strike at any time.
Cut to pie chart showing "Cause of death in persons over 50 Years of age:
Heart Disease 42% ROBOTS 58%
...And when they grab you with those metal claws you can't break free,
because they're made of metal, and
robots are strong.
Now, for just 4 dollars a month you can achieve piece of mind in a world
full of
crime and robots with Old Glory Insurance
So don't cower under your afghan any longer, make a choice, Old Glory
Insurance, for when the
metal ones decide to come for you....and they will."
WARNING: Persons denying the existence of robots may be robots themselves.