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Tips on Dating from Aunty Anthropod

Before there was computer dating, there was telephone dating, but I don't think people really use the telephone any more because the computer has taken over. Still, in its time, the telephone was a good way to meet people who you might not otherwise have met but whom you might want to date. I met my partner through telephone dating, and we've been together for years.

Here's how it worked. Someone left bait on a kind of glorified private answering machine service designed just for this purpose. Then others went through and listen to all the bait and if something sounded good to them they would leave a message for that person. Counter-bait, if you like. Obviously, this message should tell the bait-leaver how to contact the counter-bait-leaver. Then the bait-leaver would come back and listen to the counter-bait, and if they liked the sound of it they contacted the counter-bait-leaver. Maybe they'd chat for a while first, maybe they'd meet, maybe they'd jump in the sack. Not usually, though, so don't expect miracles.

In my experience it worked better for women to leave bait. There's lots of reasons for this. There are a lot more men looking for women than there are women for men. (That's why women often didn't have to pay for the service, while men do.) There was also the safety issue. Men aren't so afraid to give out their phone numbers (unless they're married, but then they can use the cell or something), whereas women are a bit more cautious about that kind of thing. Rightly so. There's also (sorry guys) the dullness of most men's ads. I got excruciatingly bored listening to men's ads in no time at all, because they all seemed to say "Hello ladies my name's bob i'm 5-11 180 lbs considered good-looking not into head games..." *Yawn*. So women (not ladies, Aunty's many things but she's no lady), Aunty advises you to just put out your bait and they will come to you.

Now obviously a huge key to success here - this is just as true for computer dating, of course - is what your bait says about you. Think carefully about what you want to say. Be original. Be informative. Try and capture something unique about who you really are. Be honest! That's important. If you ever do meet, the other person will see quickly enough what you're really like. No point lying about it.

I have never done the computer dating thing, because I met my mathc before it became popular, but it seems to me that telephone dating had two distinct advantages over computer dating:

  • Most of the bait- and counter-bait-leavers were in my local calling area. This is a good thing. Love is grand, and absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that, but long distance love can be very trying indeed. I tried it too, and it didn't work out very well. I prefers close-up love, and I think you might too.
  • On the phone, you can hear the other person's voice. That's really important for me. The timbre, the diction, the grammar, the whole speaking style: I like to hear that. It tells me a lot.

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