Giant Space Hamsters (thing)

Giant space hamsters are exactly what they sound like – cute but brown-bear-sized rodents with thick fur. They are found on worlds having colonies of Tinker Gnomes. Giant space hamsters come in a variety of colours, but are usually golden brown with white underbellies, bands and spots. They are well muscled but appear fat. A giant space hamster can store up to 200 lbs. of food in its cheeks.

The Origin Of The Giant Space Hamster

Giant Space Hamsters have been produced at great effort by Tinker Gnomes. They were produced after it was observed that a hamster, if left to itself will often run pointlessly in a wheel wasting lots of energy. If this energy could be harnessed it could be put to use, powering a bedside light for example (Tinker Gnomes are generally short sighted, a result of poor lighting). If a standard hamster could produce enough power for a bedside light, to produce more power all that is needed was a bigger hamster. A hamster was bred that was three times the size of a standard hamster. This was wired up to a toaster and, after much coaxing, bribary and a bit of prodding, bread was toasted. Rejoycing in the dawn of the new hamster-powered age the hamster breeding committee planned their next project. After a lot of scribbling they worked out the power to size ratio for hamsters based on the toaster results. Based on this data the minimum hamster size for a vehicle to reach escape velocity was calculated, and work began on the breeding of the Giant Space hamster.

Combat:
Giant Space Hamsters normally have only one mode of attack – a nasty bite. They avoid even this on most occasions, as domestic breeds have been cowardly. However, wild breeds are more aggressive, and they briefly charge at anyone who approaches a burrow. They trample and shoulder barge their oponent before they run like hell away to safety.

Careless gnome handlers have sometimes been bitten and stuffed in a cheek pouch. Trapped gnomes are merely covered in hamster spit, and are eventually spat out like old chewing gum when the hamster sees food.

Habitat/Society:
Giant space hamsters are normally kept on huge hamster ranches run by gnome colonists on various worlds. These giant space hamsters travel in small packs, browsing the local landscape and living in special hamster hutches constructed by their gnomish keepers. The hamster hutches often include huge artificial burrows, giant tredmills and some gnomes have constructed enormous and colorful pipe systems (some of them transparent) through which these creatures may crawl aboveground.

Wild packs of these creatures have evolved from escaped domestic species and exist on worlds long settled by gnomes, though they make easy prey for many carnivores and are thus quite rare in the wilderness. Wild giant space hamsters are the same size as domestic ones, but they dig their own burrows (about six feet wide and 120 to 180 feet long) in hillsides.

Gnomes are unable to figure out how to reduce their breeding rates, aside from separating the sexes (this conclusion was suggested after a 22-year-long research program that included numerous gnome fatalities). Giant space hamsters can easily have several litters in one year and they grow to breeding adulthood in but two years. These creatures live 18 years at most and remain fertile all their adult lives.

The giant space hamster is cowardness incarnate. If a gnome jumps in front of a giant space hamster and shouts: “BOO” it most certainly will turn its tail and run. In fact one of the most striking signs of gnome-presence from high altitude is the many straight “roads” through the vegetation created by fleeing giant space hamsters. In fact a gnome research committee is at this time debating the appliance of giant space hamster usage in infrastructure development.

Gnomes have found that the meat of giant space hamsters is quite tasty. Space hamster meat is called “space ham” or the shorter version: “spaham”. Many gnomes eat large quantities of spaham with every meal. Many hamster ranches simply breed giant space hamster as livestock.

Gnomish colonies without such ranches sometimes send forth whole expeditions of fearless Hamster Hunters, gnomes who drive through the cosmos on their sidewheelers, singing the praises of spaham as they go hunting for prey.

Breeds Of Giant Space Hamster

Miniature Giant Space Hamster:
Being the same size as a normal hamster this creature is often kept as a pet.

Yellow Musk Giant Space Hamster:
This yellow-furred hamster has a terrible odor. It emits a 30-foot radius cloud of poisonous gas 6 times a day and causeing nausea, blindness and weakness (anyone who has owned a normal hamster will know what I'm talking about, imagine that x10!)

Subterranean Giant Space Hamster:
This creature can dig through any material up to soft rock. It uses its enlarged massive claws for burrowing. Containment is a real problem

Sabre-Toothed Giant Space Hamster:
This hamster possessed vast teeth that can do hideous ammounts of damage to anything it decides to nibble on.

Rather Wild Giant Space Hamster:
When confronted by non-hamsters, this one will charge them, regardless of the situation. Rather Wilds often die of exaustion.

Invisible Giant Space Hamster:
"I understand that the Hamster-Breed funding committie stated that it wanted to see the results but there have been err...unforseen...technical dificulties..."

Two-Headed Lernean Bombardier Giant Space Hamster:
“Well, we’re certainly not likely to make this mistake again, or at least not more than once again anyway”.

Tyrranohamsterous Rex:
This immense space hamster poses absolutely no threat whatsoever, unless it runs in fright and steps on someone. Any display of, fire, bright light, loud noise, etc. frightens this beast which then crashes through all terrain features for up to 4 miles in its panic to escape. The now-defunct gnome colony that first bred this species did so “because it was there.”

Giant Space Hamster of Ill Omen:
This possibly legendary creature is an individual rumoured to be of unusual size, even larger than a Tyrannohamsterous Rex. “Wooly Rupert” as he is known among gnomes, is also said to be highly intelligent. Tales say he is not well disposed towards gnomes of any sort, preferring to squash them with his titanic paws. Gnomes everywhere fear the wrath of Wooly Rupert, though they laugh nervously and claim otherwise.