Last night, I was attacked by some kind of wild animal in the lobby of the E2 Headquarters in Breakwater, Minnesota. A lawsuit is now pending.
Because this is an active legal matter, I am not at liberty to discuss the particulars. My lawyer has advised me not to even reveal what kind of animal it was that attacked me or how much damage there was too my exquisite body. So, let's not go there right now.
I saw you in the supermarket the other day. Nice choices. We move on.
You been okay? Glad to hear it. Those earrings look like absolute shit, by the way. If you need help next time, let me know. I can help with that.
Here is a poem I wrote. I hope you will like it as much as I do. If you don't, then you lack an eye for talent (needs to be noded).
Galoshes
I am wearing galoshes
Now I take them off
Did you watch me take off
My galoshes or not?
Are you weird? Are you creepy?
Are you Peter the pee pee reaper?
Do you want to watch me
Put them on, put them on?
Are you some kind of pervert?
Does your wife know?
Do you?
Galoshes, galoshes
Put 'em on, take 'em off