Recently, I've found myself contemplating the fact that if I was just a hair less intelligent, a smidge less observant, one yard short of a first down or one egg short of a dozen that I would be a lot happier. Don't get me wrong, I know more than a few people who could run circles around me using that lump of goo behind their eyes. Yet, these very same people, with the exception of maybe one, seem to find no joy in their intelligence, myself included.

As the days flow into weeks, and the weeks melt into months, I find that the only way to satisfy my thirst for knowledge is to tackle as many problems and dilemas as possible, whether they be personal or whether they concern the entire planet does not seem to make a difference.

For example, I might not be able to adopt a poverty-stricken Cambodian child or two, yet I am compelled to learn more and more about their plight. How is Cambodia any different than, say, Vietnam, South Korea, many parts of Africa? How come only celebrities with enough cash to last until Maddox's grandson dies find it necessary to make a difference, no matter how small? And, did I just answer my own question?

Need more proof? Just take a look at my blog posts. Not a positive or joyous one in the bunch. Sure the one about Rock, Paper, Scissors got a few laughs, but if you read carefully, my rage and violent tendencies at such an inane topic hits you like, well, a punch in the face. Take that, paper! I'm looking at you, Wide Ruled!

Sometimes I find myself having to intentionally numb my mind after, literally, spending hours mechanically pouring over newspaper articles, books, even encyclopedias, for Zeus' sake. And, believe me, nothing zombifys a good mind like television. As much as I enjoy watching Family Guy, Aqua Teen, the entire Adult Swim lineup for that matter, hardly anything on TV stimulates much more than our brain's inherent vunerablility to epilepsy.

Yet, I keep watching because I find that, more and more, I derive enjoyment almost exclusively from crude, low-brow, uncensored material, regardless of medium. Although, I will officially state that the puzzle-solving and incresingly complex tasks found in many video games today are more than mental exercise at any age or intelligence level, yet the fun factor is not reduced one iota. By the way, did you know that the iota is actually the ninth letter of the Greek alphabet? I did, but do you see me smiling? In fact, you don't see me at all.

My theory is that since I enjoy learning and absorbing knowledge, I tend to overanalyze the information I encounter. Sometimes, I do so to the point that the knowledge is no longer enjoyable because I come up with more questions than answers but, regardless, am unable to stop myself from procuring more information on the subject. This inevitably leads to mental burn out. At which point I seek out activities which require the least amount of brainpower (i.e. television).

After all is said and done, and despite my complaints, I would not trade down my intelligence, such as it is, for anything. For without it, I would not have found this gargantuan source of inspiration y'all call Everything2. And while I may not be the sharpest blade on the razor (see?), just the thought of being blissfully ignorant is, ironically, depressing.