Portland:
Still alone, still surrounded somehow by friends. How long can this luck last? The town seems so accessable, better than i imagined, and my first host, sprung upon and early woke, is generous, knowledgable, funny and kin(d). I can feel a new phase starting and remember how much i changed in my Bard phase, how much in the post-Bard phase (hardened? opened? i can't tell you how, just how much..), and wonder what will emerge here.

I wonder if all the things i believe vehemently are immature, and if that invalidates them. Contantly - is this valid? is this worth professing? will i still want to defend this when i hear it slung back at me? How can i even begin to know how to answer my own questions, but i know it's important to belive something, and know that odds are, i'm wrong.

I gave to you, now you give to me
I'd like to know what you've learned

I'm inventing a life and hoping it's possible to live, worth living. I wonder if i'll ever feel native to anywhere. I feel most at home on E2 (when things are good) or with my best friends, but still i'm an immigrant, self-conscious, a newcomer to each.

Noplace to belong, but i think i can get along anywhere. I hope.

I'm thankful.

I can pick up moJoe. He's not so big.