The third installment of Hollywood's Superman
franchise and quite possibly the worst movie ever made.
Our story begins with a crazy chain reaction of events, presented in a sort of 1940's humor sort-of way. A bunch of people interacting causes some kind of accident where a car is filling up with water. Of course, Superman comes to the rescue and saves the day, and everyone is once again assured that he is the bomb.
Fast forward a little and we find that Lois has gone on vacation or something, and Superman is left without a love interest. But wait! Lest we forget Lana Lang, a pseudo-sweetheart of his from Smallville? Lana and Clark Kent cross paths, and Clark becomes a bit of a domestic boyfriend type. You know, having picnics in a hayfield while the little Lang boy almost gets sucked up by some huge farming machine, stuff like that.
Enter Richard Pryor, the crazy crook who decides to take a computer programming class. Pryor's best friends become 1 and 0, and soon he has devised a nutty plan to skim interest out of people's bank accounts and place it into his. This catches the attention of Robert Wagner (who you may or may not remember from Baseketball), who owns the company that Pryor works for. He doesn't fire Pryor, however, instead he hires him on to work on a deviant plot to kill Superman. The idea is that there must be kryptonite floating around in space somewhere. If they can pinpoint a piece using high-tech satellites and analyze the contents, they could manufacture kryptonite and use it to subdue the Man Of Steel.
This seems all fine and dandy except that the majestic computers who do the analyzing can't figure out a small percentage of kryptonite's contents, so Richard Pryor decides that the missing element is "tar" (you know, the stuff found in cigarettes and asphalt). They give superman a piece of this Fool's Kryptonite, but it doesn't kill him.
Instead it turns Superman into a badass. He's boozing, picking up sluts and bringing them to the Statue Of Liberty, he even straightens out the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Everyone denounces him as a hero, and meanwhile, Robert Wagner is devising some crazy super computer. Superman ends up in a junkyard, where one of the lamest parts of the movie comes into play. Superman splits into two people (the Evil Superman and the Good Clark Kent) and they duke it out. I can see from this scene where Chuck Palahniuk got his notions for Fight Club.
So now Superman beat some sense into himself and he goes to stop Wagner at his secret supercomputer lair. Wagner has a computer screen with Superman on it, a sort of missile guidance system that somehow inherited the noises from the Atari 2600 version of Pac-Man. Superman is successful in dodging the 8-bit missiles, and enters the lair, where he is hit by this big laser. Ok, now somehow, he fights this supercomputer, but Wagner's sister (who played the principal in the pirate radio movie "Pump Up The Volume") gets sucked into the computer's innards and gets converted into a Cyborg. A friggin' Cyborg. Yeah, and Superman wins and everyone is put to justice.
Worst Movie Ever.