Hate: “to feel intense dislike, or extreme aversion or hostility”. Aversion…if I want to avoid you do I hate you? Or more do I want to hate you? They tell you time and time again: Hate is too strong of a word, you don’t hate them. But what happens when hate isn’t strong enough? I want to hate you, avoid you, keep you at bay. The want to hate is there, it’s the ability that we cannot obtain. To turn away and run is all we really want. However this sets itself just out of reach. Taunting. Reminding us what we must obtain to have it: hate, an aversion, a disconnection. Emptiness would be a tempting alternative. But it too sits on a pedestal laughing at us. There are times when hate is visible, almost in our grasps. But then hides behind a word, a phrase, a gesture. Cursing as it vanishes from sight we watch as it disappears all because of an old, comfortable, habit. A habit we are unable to break all because we cannot bring ourselves to utter those three little words: I hate you. Yes they are easy to say, as are most words. Unfortunately it is near impossible to mean them, for them to carry the implication we so long to feel. So we continue our run on the hamster wheel. Uttering empty words under our breath hoping for once they’ll carry a meaning. But they never will. All because of a word, a phrase, a habit.