For the first time in almost two months I stepped into a movie theater, excited to see “V for Vendetta” and the gorgeous Natalie Portman, I had been looking forward to this for quite a while. I bought my ticket with my usual test of the attendant’s memory, “Same thing,” following my friends in front of me.
Since I rarely open my wallet wide enough to enter a movie theater now that I am trying to save money for my big move, I decided to also have a nice unhealthy bag of popcorn; carbohydrates, cholesterol and sodium. After dusting my treat with that shaker of butter/salt I turn to find my friends chatting with a couple that I do not know. I walk up and stand near them, but I try to keep far enough away to save myself the trouble of an introduction.
After successfully saving myself from having my head filled with names of people I will never see again my friends and I make our way to the theater, “First one on the left,” after having our tickets torn.
We walk up the steps, which is a big deal – only recently has our quaint little town been introduced to the concept of “stadium seating.” With my friend being legally blind we choose our typically close seats, but for once I do not care because there are no bad seats in a theater with stadium seating.
As the lights dimmed and the curtains spread to reveal the soon to be illuminated screen I realized how long it has been since I have seen a movie, and how behind I am on seeing previews; oh how I love to watch the previews.
As the first particles of light hit the silver screen cars appeared, speeding down streets packed tightly with cars and pedestrians; my heart sunk. I watched, but I watched in horror. It wasn’t exactly as if I could turn away, even if I wanted to. Women swooned over reckless men putting other people’s lives in danger for their selfish thrill seeking. Guys feeling the need to prove they have testis and they know the proper use of a steering wheel.
Honestly, it was terrifying; to realize that our society accepts this as “entertainment.” IQs were dropping all over the room, until – I can’t speak of it…
“Man, if you ain’t out of control; you ain’t in control.”
As that simple, absurd line was uttered I couldn’t hold back anymore. At first it was just a little chuckle, then a laugh, a snort – then I lost it completely. I laughed so vociferously that every eye in the theater turned my way in alarm; but they knew I was right and they soon joined in. The entire theater had let loose in laughter by the time the trailer ended. I was glad, I was glad to find that we were not going to let this pass as entertainment. Hollywood will not put out this refuse and expect for the public to eat it up like tasty movie theater popcorn. I can only hope that the hilarity felt in that theater will mirror Box Office returns for this movie.