June 26

The beginning of me, yet the end of her,
And I couldn't control it, like I'm sure I could today.
I wonder what I would have done if it had been me,
Instead of her going through hell the motherly way.

Could I breathe,
Could I think,
Could I live,
Could I give up the chance of ever knowing,
Where the hell this piece of me is going?

How long did it take her to choose,
Was it that moment she knew I was there too?
Or did she fight with her heart like I would,
Realizing she had to decide and the time just flew?

Now I breathe,
Now I think,
Now I live,
But I didn't give up the chance of knowing,
So I will find her and see how her dreams are going.

I wonder why it is I have no niche,
Why no one looks like me or feels the way I do.
I make family of the people I find and piece together,
Those minds and hearts I deem genuine and true.

But goddamnit, I want flesh and blood like mine,
I want someone I don't have to make excuses to,
Someone I don't have to win over and impress,
'Cause I'm tired of waiting, I'm ready to do.

Do you breathe?
Do you think?
Do you live?
This is the least I have to know,
And if I can't know you, where did you go?