Homemade ice cream

3 lb coffee can with lid
1 lb coffee can with lid
rock salt
crushed ice
2 cups whipping cream
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 ts vanilla extract

1. nestle the 1 lb coffee can inside the 3 lb coffee can.
2. fill the 1 lb coffee can with whipping cream, sugar, and vanilla extract.
3. layer crushed ice and rock salt around the 1 lb coffee can.
4. cover both cans with lids, and roll the cans back and forth for about 15 minutes (longer for thicker ice cream).

chocolate syrup
mashed Reese's Peanut Butter Cups
crushed peppermint sticks and 1/2 ts of peppermint extract
any fresh fruit

What to do when you're jonesing for ice cream:

Admit it. It happens a lot, especially when you're broke or after you've been out until all hours. You stumble into the kitchen hoping that the fridge has spontaneously generated some tasty treats for you to ingest. Hoping beyond hope, you ease open the door...only to be rewarded with a half-gallon of milk, a crusty jar of mustard, and a few rolls of film.

Well, my friend, help is here.

I ran across this recipe a few years ago, and it has served me well in times of great trial and distress. The finished product isn't exactly Ben and Jerry's; it's more like the soft-serve stuff you get at TCBY, but it's satisfying in the way that all homemade treats are. You not only get the practically instant gratification of ice cream, it's ice cream that YOU MADE. You are a god, in control of your gastronomic destiny. Try it. Impress your friends. It's also a great thing to make while drunk, because there's no chance of burning down the house or of severing your extremities.

This type of ice cream is also great with stuff mixed in, like toasted coconut, M&M's, or nuts. Add some Hershey's syrup or maple extract to change the base flavor. Go wild. Be bold. YOU have made ice cream. You fucking rock.

Ice Cream in a Bag

1 gallon ziplock bag
1 sandwich-sized ziplock bag
3 T. salt
1 tsp. vanilla extract, maple extract, or peppermint extract
3 T. sugar
1 cup 1% milk (the fat kind will work, too, but skip the skim)
ice (crushed, if you can get it)

Step 1: Fill gallon ziplock bag halfway with ice. Add 3 tablespoons of salt.
Step 2: In small bag, combine milk, extract, and sugar. Squeeze out air from small bag and seal tightly.
Step 3: Place small bag in big bag. Knead for 5 minutes.

Aren't you just the coolest?

Here's an alternate and simpler recipe if you have a Ninja 7-in-1 Creami or the deluxe model.

You will need

• 1 cup heavy whipping cream
• 1 cup milk
• 2 tablespoons of instant pudding mix of whatever flavour you want. I like Oreo.
• 1 bowl
• 1 whisk
• 1 of your little pint holders at the ready
• Whatever other toppings you want

Making

1. Combine heavy whipping cream, milk, and instant pudding mix into the bowl.
2. Whisk until the pudding mix has broken up, and then some. I'd estimate around 5-6 minutes; this is one of those recipies where it'll still taste just as good if you eyeball it.
3. When complete, pour it into the pint container. Put on lid and freeze for at least a day*
4. Actually, if you want to add any extra SOLID toppings, wait until it's about to freeze solid and quickly mix them in and then shove it back in the freezer before it thaws again. This'll help keep it spread throughout.
5. Take solidified ice cream out of the freezer. Put the pint container into your Ninja godsend-machine. If you have any liquid toppings, add them now.
6. Use Ice Cream button. Use it again if it's not soft enough.
7. Take it out, and enjoy right from the container! Freeze it if you don't finish it.

This is a pretty easy way to make a nice ice cream treat, however I do suspect that if you're careful enough and smart about the shape of container you freeze it in you could potentially use a regular ol' blender. Here's how I think that might go:

1. continue until
2. step 3
3. Pour into a tall container of some kind, one that will fit in your blender and make contact with the blades. Preferably not glass, and something that it's easy to heat up. Metal is your best candidate if you can find something like that.
4. Add solid toppings.
5. Put in freezer for a day.
6. Take out of freezer. Heat container as evenly as possible, just enough to slide the ice cream out and into the blender.
7. Blend slowly and carefully; you might have a milkshake on your hands if you overdo it. If this does happen, you could probably just freeze it a bit and eat it later, though.
8. Pour ice cream out of blender. 
9. Enjoy responsibly.

If you do use either of these recipes, let me know how they come out!