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How's My Driving

<free phone number>

A sign, usually in yellow and black, affixed to the rear of so many of today's professional drivers' vehicles (often twinned with another, declaring Our drivers carry less than $20.). Along with the eye-catching question and a (often free) phone number, there may also be a serial number, unique to that driver. If there is no serial number you are expected to note the vehicle's registration number.

Having this sign on the back of your van presumably works in two ways

  1. It allows other road users to tell comment on bad driving
  2. It makes the driver paranoid about A, resulting in better driving.
As a driver, it means that if you're sat behind a van or lorry which cut you up, you can exact your revenge, thus relieving your building road rage.

The "How's My Driving?" Game

Firstly, a disclaimer: please don't use a mobile phone while driving It's dangerous. If it's not illegal where you live, it should be. If you're going to play The "How's My Driving?" Game while driving, please use a hands free kit.

So, how do you play The "How's My Driving?" Game?
  1. So, you're driving behind a van, prominently displaying its How's My Driving? sticker. You see the free phone number. Dial it (after pulling over) asap. Now, the fun begins.
  2. You will probably be thanked for you call, and asked to identify the vehicle about which you wish to comment. As mentioned above, either by the special serial number or the registration plate.
  3. Next, you will be asked for your comments. It's fun when there is a person on the other end of the phone (you may equally well be talking to a machine).
  4. Now's your chance to be creative. Remember unless the How's My Driving? driver has really pissed you off, it's no fun to be overly vindictive, as you might be costing the driver a job. Instead, why not just make outlandish claims, that will never be believed anyway
    • This guy just ran over a puppy and shoved it in his boot! He said he was going to eat it.
    • Can you ask this guy to turn his radio down? He's listening to Belinda Carlisle. I ask you.
    • This jerk in front of me just starting shooting pedestrians. Oh. Oh oh NO! He's coming over... Oh Please. PLEASE DON'T <click>
How much fun can the drive home be?

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