At midnight it will be his first deathday. Twenty-four hours after that it will be my birthday. He was older than I, and always stronger. Was.

To go cross the country would be to go home to ghosts of memories.

I should be stronger than this. I should know the universe has spared us this moment as it did not him. I should be somewhere else, anywhere else. Living. Flying a kite. Making music. Spending time with azureus-eyed seraphim.

I am many things, but I am not that strong.

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