Maybe you enjoy a lifestyle others frown upon. Perhaps there are aspects of your lifestyle that are "problematic" (Internet kiddie term) for others.

My named is Berhardt Illych Goats (friends call me Behr) and I have been a subscriber to Problematic Lifestyle Magazine since it was introduced by Newt Gingrich backed publishers in 1994. I was a charter subscriber to the issue where a celebrity shows his collection of mounted human heads in the den of his expansive Hollywood Hills mansion. Wholesome. Real. Much like you are inside. Not what you show others. Who you ARE inside is beautiful like me. We are blessed by the Lords and Ladies of Hades. Orgy now. As the editorial staff points out with the regular cover slogan of "Fuck ALL the consequences" that is a big part of leading a problematic lifestyle.

I remember the first time I intentionally ran over a four-year-old human child that wandered into the street after a ball. I felt so good as I hit him at fifty miles per hour, then braked hard and back over him while laughing my ass off, but I knew my actions would be seen as problematic by many others. You've had many similar experiences. You just haven't told mother about them yet. Isn't that right? You know it is. Inside this is how you really are. Stop denying it. Let it out. Be the wolf instead of the sheep for once.

When you look at the cover of an issue of Problematic Lifestyle Magazine, you are treated to color photographs (not black & white) of homes of people who live extremely problematic lifestyles that would curl the asshole hairs of the modern American liberal, otherwise known as sloth and low intelligence personified. Good stuff.

Each issue of the magazine begins with a letter from the editor. Graham Hortonofsky, the editor-in-chief, uses this page to rant angrily about social issues and why he pisses on all of them freely and rightfully. Always an informative read.

Mr. Hortonofsky was charged and released by cops after he murdered three minority boys in the parking lot of a Toys-R-Us in 1980. He later made millions off his book And I'll Shoot Three More One Day, which allowed him to buy a beautiful mansion where he burns three crosses on the front lawn every night while drinking beer with his shotgun-wielding power lifting buddies. He was chosen to lead this magazine for many reasons. Having editorial experience is not one of them. He spent his life selling used cars and wearing white sheets to rallies in the woods. The plates on his Mercedes famously read "CNT-LCKR." He represents the pinnacle of the problematic lifestyle. His three mansions, yacht, and private island (all bought with profits from his book and famous "race-bating tours") have all been featured in the publication, as have a number of his roofie oriented social outings.

It will then cut to the home of a famous rich person who lives a problematic lifestyle. Usually, the individual and friends and family are pictured living it up while surrounded by wonderful opulence and extremely problematic works of art on display in their homes and social settings. One picture series featured a bar in the woods where a boy is nailed to the wall with railroad ties with the words "pervert" and "sick child" written all over him in Sharipe and the blood of his dog. Really graphic pictures. Wonderful stuff. People pay top dollar for this kind of quality journalism. You can find it in Problematic Lifestyle Magazine.

I never read Esquire magazine but that might also be good. I am not sure as I have not read it so cannot post a review.

One of the things I like are the stories submitted by readers about extremely inappropriate and problematic things they have done in their lives. Some of the letters are very revealing. The things humans do to each other is wonderfully depicted in these pages.

Subscribe online today. Recurring payment plan is good for you.

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