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Psymon Stark is a rider in SSX Tricky, a surrealistic tripped-out snowboarding game released in 2001 by EA Sports BIG for the Playstation 2, and subsequently for the GameCube and the Xbox. He's a psychotic maniac with a passion for daredevilry, pranks, spear fishing and raspberry jelly-coated deep-fried candy bars. His conscience on the mountain is his dead friend, whom Psymon channels through the tattoo of him somewhere on his body. He loves to intimidate, alienate and otherwise scare the shit out of the other riders on the circuit, especially Kaori, the kawaii Orange Explosion Fun Girl, and even sometimes his only SSX "friend," the riot grrl Zoe.

Psymon, who’s from Canada, is a tough bastard, taking the hits and delivering them back fiercely. He enjoys a nice trick landing and a stunning wipeout equally. His dream date is Sheila Burgess, a hulkingly ugly bodybuilder (think Arnold Schwarzenegger in a bikini, or better yet, don’t) from Vancouver (I'm thinking Psymon has a skewed sense of what to look for in a girl, much like he has skewed sense of everything in general). His favorite movie is Ride to the Hills, a mountain biking highlight video, his favorite piece of literature is Tattoo, and he loves to rampage in his padded room to Slayer and Napalm Death.

Psymon is 5'9" and 185 pounds of rippling muscle, most of it emblazoned with chains encircling his body. He has thick, blunt spikes of hair about six inches long that are mostly neon brown but have black roots, dark rings around his freaky I-will-murder-you-with-a-spoon-Just-Kidding! eyes and a splash of dark, shadowy facial hair, manifesting itself mainly in spiked curved sideburns and a thin goatee, with a few days' stubble over the rest of his face. The silver lip ring and matching soul patch stud finish off the vision of strangeness.

Psymon is a balanced rider, with base (minus the boosts given by boards) stats of 6, 15, 12 and 11 to start and maximums of 36, 35, 35 and 34 (Edging, Speed, Stability and Tricks). To match, he mainly rides BX boards, which are balanced between boosting speed and trick skill.

In SSX Tricky (and in SSX, I assume) there are Übertricks, which are insane and usually physically impossible displays of contortionism and board manipulation. Psymon’s personal Übertrick is called the Guillotine, in which he grabs the board and swings it around his neck, with the nexus of rotation somehow seemingly located a little bit inward from his Adam’s apple…after which he collects the board and sticks it back under his feet. Hopefully he lands it. When landed by itself (with no rotations, other grabs or additional Übertricks) the Guillotine scores 20,750 points, making it the 9th most valuable personal Übertrick (of 12, : P).

Every rider in SSX Tricky has seven outfits and twelve boards. Everyone starts with one outfit and two boards; outfits 2-6 are gained by finishing the first 5 chapters of the Trick Book and the Master outfit is gained by attaining Master rank, (achieving Gold on every Race and Showoff in World Circuit Mode) while boards 3-11 are gained by achieving new ranks and the Überboard is gained by finishing the rider’s Trick Book. Here are Psymon’s in order of collection, with names and descriptions:


Casual Fridays – White wife-beater, tight blue jeans, matching gray boots and gloves, which are part of every one of Psymon’s outfits.
Jungle Rawk – Black shirt with no sleeves and CB/CB in the style of the AC/DC logo, jungle camo pants with a red belt.
Serpentine – No shirt, revealing the “Stark Raving Mad” tattoo which covers Psymon’s entire back, gray stonewashed jeans with black shiny knee-patches.
Bark!Bark!Bark! – Black wife-beater, a darker pair of jungle camo pants with a more compact design, black belt with garish silver buckle.
Konvict – Dirty white wife-beater with the prison number 72132-669, bright orange pants, gray belt.
Nightmare – A psychotic amalgam of black and red with gray straps and buckles over the entire body.
Master – Nightmare with a supposedly reflective coating; but he looks like he just swam in a pool of Elmer’s Glue.

Boards: (all are BX unless otherwise described, description structured as follows – footside;underside, with skill boost numbers at the end, listed in the same order as noted previously)

Bio Hazard – Gradient of dark red to black; red with black feather and arrow designs with “Psymon” in white in the same font as the “Stark Raving Mad” tattoo. 1,1,0,1
Evil Eye (Freestyle) – Silver with small black skull and crossbones at the base; blue eye and a larger white skull and crossbones on a black background. 1,0,1,1
Dolmans Land – Scuffed wintery brick wall; yellow, green and purple graffiti of a word I can’t read. 2,3,1,1
Chained Heat – Black sides with a curved maroon stripe running front to back; what seems to be a black heart with a chain affixed. 2,3,1,2
Mayhem – Bright orange with a prison number that apparently matches the one from the Konvict shirt; orange with a silver chain. 4,3,4,2
Flesh Eater – White with a thin red stripe with red dots running parallel to it; white on a third of the board then skeleton ghouls in red and black. 3,4,3,3
Torc Rules (Alpine) – White with some strange silver contraption designs; blue with what appears to be a curved old-fashioned barbell of about 100 lbs. 5,7,6,7
Live Wire – Black with a sky blue lightning bolt; yellow with a caricature in black of a lightning bolt striking a man. 5,6,5,5
Shock Therapy – Jet black; gray with black/light gray lines shifting one small set of pixels up or down so as to create the appearance of cracks. 8,7,6,6
BansheeDeep sky blue with spinal column in black outlines; skulls laughing and sticking tongues out in the same color scheme. 7,6,7,7
Dogs of War – Black in the center with a gradient outwards into dark chartreuse; the Grim Reaper in black robes with tan bones and a wooden scythe. 8,8,7,8
ÜBERBOARD – Bright silver. 9,9,8,9

Psymon is voiced excellently by the inimitable and indomitable Jim Rose, kahuna of the Jim Rose Circus, who says Psymon Stark and Jim Rose have exactly the same personality. Some of Psymon's most memorable and interesting quotes from the game, with the event during/after which they occur:

Trick Landing:
Light up the groupies!
Full burger platter, man!
Like a long-necked goose!

Big Air:
French Toast and SYRUP! (my favorite line)
Sweet danger!
No stranger to danger!
Whoa, my piercin’s are whistlin’!

Just a pain appreciation drill!
This is not happening! Maybe it is...
If you're gonna go down, go down in flames.
Anarchy! Chaos! Confusion! Oh my!
It's not the pain, it's the ridicule that hurts!
Who cares? I'm a nihilist!
Back in the zone, snowcone!
Look! A human snowplow!
I'm having an epiphany!
Scar tissue!
Contusions and confusions!
Pain and suffering…All right!
Whoops! There goes my mind again!
Problem is, I like falling down!
Speed kills!
No broken bones! That’s a shame.
Is that a dagger I see before me?

Selection Screen:
It’s been a while since they let me come out to play, heheh…
Don’t look at me like that!

End of Race:
I’ll plague on your codpiece!
Big hairy freakin’ deal.
You call that aggression? Rahahahaha!
I’m gonna pop that balloon next race, loser.

Backstory and Interview “Clips” (Directly imported from the game)
‘Sketchy’ Psymon is a fearless snowboarder with the ability to unnerve every one of his opponents…He perpetuates the mythology around his accident (he jumped a huge gap on a mountain bike and landed on some power lines, blacking out the entire Okanogan Valley) with his erratic behavior on and off the track.

What’s your favorite course?
Dessert man, I usually eat it first. My favorite is Crépes with Chocolate Sauce. I’m also a fan of deep-fried candy bars. Mmmmmm, tasty!
Um, I meant race track, which race track is your favorite?
Oh. Uh…I guess the Elysium Alps ‘cause they’re killer. It’s huge man, and can’t make any mistakes or you’re frozen jelly. Mmm, raspberry jelly, also good with deep-fried candy bars.

Tell me, what’s your greatest strength?
Grit baby, pure grit. I feel no pain; no nerve endings left – check this out, see? Can’t feel a thing! You try!
Ah, no, no thanks, I think I’ll pass.
I said hit me! C’mon! Hit me, c’mon! Give me your best shot, ya pansy! What’sa matter? Don’t got the guts? No spirit? You some sorta peacenik or sumptin? C’mon! Hit me! Hit MEEEEE!
Hey, nice left, dude! What? No, no, I couldn’t do THAT – I told him to hit me. No. NO! (arguing with his tattoo)

What do you do when you’re not boarding?
I got a little bike shop where I take sad old cycles and turn them into smoking road rockets. Oh, and I do a bit of fishing.
Ocean, lake, or river?

Note: I gathered all of this information directly from the game myself.

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