Springfield, IL is the
capital of
Illinois. It has a population of about
100,000, and unless you
maturbate every day to
Abraham Linoln memorabilia, it is one of the most
boring places in the
United States. Perhaps I'm
biased because I grew up there, but if you ask anyone under the age of 21 what's good to do in Springfield, they'll tell you either "
Loiter at
Denny's," "loiter at
Perkins," or "loiter at somebody's house." Possibly all three. I don't have the actual article, but I read one time in the city's paper, the
State Journal-Register, that in a survey of the most
populous 300
cities in
America, Springfield ranked around 287th as far as available activities for people under 21. Sure, there are a few
bars and a
pool hall or two, and there's a
crappy little water slide that charges way more than its worth.
But hey, Lincoln! If you like Lincoln, or anything that he touched or looked at or vomited on, it's in Springfield! You can see where he's buried, where he lived, trees that he had in his yard, and I think they have some fossilized Lincoln turds around. Lincoln Lincoln, and also Lincoln. And for this, they have a booming tourist industry.
On thing I forgot to mention above is the
world-famous thing which nobody knows about, the
horseshoe. Mmmm,
tasty! You can only find these served in Springfield and the surrounding area for some reason. Ask for a horseshoe at your favorite
restaurant today!