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Dear Mum,

By the time you read this I will be dead.
Swansea lost two-nil to Millwall so
I'm being promoted to
that big old division in the sky,
where everyone sports Lee Trundle cuts
and I hold an eternal season pass.

Don't blame yourself Mum
for you were not to know.
Don't take my posters down.
Don't sell my stuff.

Dear Mum,

By the time I write this you should be dead.
Overcome with grief at the thought of
burying a son.
Swansea can still be promoted Mum
Provided we win a handful of remaining fixtures.
I hope they have QVC in heaven
and that window box you always dreamed of.

Don't blame me Mum
for I needed that new season pass.
I hope you had insurance
or I'm selling all your stuff.

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