I want to damage something.
I want to find something small and vulnerable and rip it to shreds.
I started out in a good mood this evening. Everything was going nicely. I played a little on the borrowed Gameboy Color, I did some stuff on E2, I chatted a little over ICQ, and I did some of the daily stuff on Neopets that I like. Then, I set ICQ to "away" and went to watch The Mummy on dvd. Life was good.
But when I got back it all started falling apart. Earlier I was having trouble with the java on Neopets. It wasn't a big deal as so far it had only affected one thing, and that was minor. Plus, although the java on Internet Explorer wasn't working, the java on Netscape was, so my Java Chatterbox for E2 was undisturbed. But when I returned, the problem with Neopets was larger than I'd hoped, and it turns out that nothing is working right with IE. Plus, although ICQ was fine when I'd left, it would not connect now. The hubby makes some stupid suggestions that anybody but a rank newbie to computers should know. I try to download the latest version of ICQ with IE only to have the download lock up and stop at 94%. Finally, it's too much. With Netscape the only program working right any more and my writeup safely entered after the passing of Word Galaxy, I restart.
ICQ and Netscape work fine, but IE still refuses to run java, and I can't play Neopets on Netscape as after about 10 minutes, it'll crash. Now it devolves into a nasty spat as I cattily make note that my system has become unstable and he was supposed to have reinstalled Windows several weeks ago. But for all the time he's had with my computer while I wasn't here using it, he's done nothing to update and help keep it stable.
Meanwhile, I'm here, things aren't working, and I'm so frustrated it makes me want to do damage to something that doesn't want to be damaged. It's not a pretty feeling. I'ts not a nice feeling. It's not a feeling of which I'm particularly proud, but right now I just don't care. I'm so frustrated, it's leaking out my eyes and down my cheeks. It's a lot like crying, only without the release.